In This Life, The Greatest Star In The Universe

Gocheok Dome.

It’s the domed baseball stadium in Guro-gu, Seoul, which holds around 20,000 to 30,000 people when used for concerts.

Ri Hyuk, looking around the empty seats, said “They say this is Gusong Motors’ home stadium.”

“Oh.”

He reminded me it was the home of the team we’d faced in the playoffs after throwing the first pitch as KG Dragons’ ceremonial pitchers.

We’d been here several times for year-end events, but it felt different from last time.

Junhyun smiled contentedly “But they’re not as strong as our team.”

We all laughed at Junhyun’s raised fist and “Top-tier KG” line.

After the KG Dragons advanced to the Korean Series with consecutive playoff wins and finished runner-up, the maknae said wistfully “It would’ve been nice if they’d won the championship.”

“It’s okay.”

Junhyun said warmly “They’re not really a championship team anyway.”

We laughed together.

Although Junhyun spoke calmly now, we knew the truth—that he’d broken the remote control clutching it in rage while watching the Korean Series earlier this month.

I said “Baseball is a dangerous sport.”

“I agree.”

Ri Hyuk nodded.

As we chatted to ease our nerves, the girl-group members dancing on stage came down. Wearing stage outfits updated into a preppy look, they greeted us cheerfully.

“Hello!”

“Hello and thank you for your hard work~”

We clapped in response, and they nodded and gave us eye-smiles.

“Good luck~”

They hurried off to prepare the red-carpet event.

Serenity.

Debuting alongside us in 2014, they’d risen since mid-last year to be regarded as the top girl group. Their early-year hit “REALITY” was a leading contender for Song of the Year.

“There are so many people I haven’t seen in ages today.”

“Right?”

It was awards season, so seeing familiar faces everywhere felt special. As I stretched to warm up, crews busied themselves onstage with final set adjustments.

Ahead of tonight’s 7 PM awards, the last rehearsal followed the cue sheet order: Serenity → NewBlack → tINSpirit.

“NewBlack, you’re up next!”

With little time, they moved quickly.

Even though the venue was larger than last year’s gymnastics competition, the stage itself felt slightly smaller, making our paths feel cramped. The route to the thrust stage seemed odd too—but we adapted quickly.

There was only one mishap.

“Uh—!”

As Jiho was stepping down after his dance, he nearly slipped on the stairs. Junhyun grabbed him just in time.

In slow motion, Biju, Ri Hyuk, and I reached out in alarm while Junhyun exhaled and lifted Jiho upright.

“—!”

The maknae pressed a hand to his chest, eyes wide.

“I thought I was really in trouble just now.”

“You okay?”

“Y-yes... I think I’m fine? That startled me though.”

We examined the slippery stair edge leading down from the stage—a management oversight on site.

Minki hyung rushed over, frowning as he complained to awards staff, while Junhyun crouched beside Jiho, rubbing his ankle.

“How’s your ankle? Sprained or anything?”

“Just a sec.”

Jiho twirled his ankle theatrically, then flashed a V sign.

“I’m totally fine.”

“Once we’re back in the waiting room, get a good massage. Otherwise you might cramp onstage later.”

“Yes, but don’t worry, hyungs~”

The maknae waved off our concern with a bright smile.

“Sometimes you hyungs treat me like... what’s it called, overc... overprotecting? Like I’m in a greenhouse.”

“Overprotection?”

“Yeah, I’m a grown adult now, not a greenhouse melon.”

We checked and thankfully found no problem.

Then our group, all crouched around the maknae, noticed shadows falling over us.

“What happened?”

We turned and saw frowns looking our way. After explaining, Yeonhu clicked his tongue.

“That was nearly a disaster.”

They bristled as if it were their own near-slip.

“We almost slipped yesterday too, right onstage.”

“It was like an ice rink.”

“Be careful too, especially Wooju hyung—your back’s at that age.”

While our juniors burst into laughter, I remained silent and Yeonhu tried to change the subject.

I asked with a smile “By the way, you guys took the CSAT the day before yesterday...”

Their expressions all changed at once.

Ha Hyun, defeated by Jiho, stared into the distance and yelled “Darn it, we’ll retake it! Good luck~!”

“Go for it!”

We laughed at the neighborhood boys sprinting back toward the stage as if oblivious.

“Rehearse well!”

“Can’t hear you! Can’t hee-!”

They covered their ears and laughed, probably thinking I was teasing them.

Ri Hyuk said “We’ll need to be extra careful today.”

“Yeah.”

On our way here, the usually clear roads clogged unexpectedly. Biju’s eggs looked weird when he tried to cook them. Ri Hyuk kept tripping over his untied shoelaces. Junhyun’s long gummy worm was missing from the pack.

He said seriously “The cola flavor is crucial, you know.”

“Cola flavor is vital.”

Some days are just like that—quiet places overcrowded, clear roads jammed. The day I was rejected by TJ Entertainment felt like that.

“Let’s call it a lucky escape.”

Just as failing the CSAT led me to these members, I believed small misfortunes would lead to great blessings.

I smiled at my juniors and patted one shoulder.

“Let’s go.”

It was time to head to the red-carpet event.

Every awards season is when idol fans’ joys and sorrows intensify.

They become sensitive, almost frantic.

The reason is simple.

Ultimately, what remains is the record.

A fan’s maxim: Like photos after a trip, what matters most in the end are the awards you won that year.

So winning—or not—becomes all the more critical.

“I’m so nervous.”

Our soufflé fans—SuPLe—had been on edge for days.

[2016 Mango Chart Awards Daesang Category Scores So Far]

After the public voting on the music site ended, a chart combining streaming scores and vote tallies circulated on SNS and forums.

Of course, it wasn’t exact—Mango’s internal data might differ.

Yet the estimates were accurate enough.

And those numbers showed...

“Wo-wow!”

NewBlack had hit the jackpot.

The awards based strictly on music performance. NewBlack was overwhelmingly first in both the Album and Artist categories.

-ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ

-Album award is definitely NewBlackㅋㅋㅋ

-Nak-hwa streaming and downloads are insane

-Mashup of fan and vote scores unstoppable..ㄷㄷ

-Likely lineup: NewBlack, NewBlack, Serenity

-Too bad Fireworks wasn’t a release this yearㅋㅋ would’ve been a shoo-in

-Isn’t Attention the annual No. 1??

-Yes, but it’s a project single so they won’t give the daesang...

Then there were the judges’ scores on top, but NewBlack led by such a margin no jury could catch up.

It was truly a music-phenomenon year for us.

Still.

“Why do I feel uneasy?”

SuPLe fans felt inexplicably unsettled, even though album and artist daesangs were almost certain by data.

-But you never knowㅋㅋㅋ

-These guys don’t care about stats (facts)

-The hosts give it however they want

-Remember last year’s mess with TEN2 and tINs?ㅋㅋ

-Might split: NewBlack-tIN-Se

-Album: NewBlack, Artist: tINs?

-Last year 4th and 7th place jumped ahead via judges

As fans noted, hosts always have final say.

“I have no control.”

Online data shifts depending on who compiles it. We could only hope to win the two main daesangs and nothing more.

“We’ll be good from now on!”

Fans prayed earnestly to the heavens.

And then—

Pitter-patter—

Answering their hopes, rain began to fall.

SuPLe fans at home surfing the web or watching TV blinked at the window.

“Look, it’s raining!”

“Why now of all times!”

Caught off guard by sudden rain, red-carpet press and fans scrambled for umbrellas and ponchos.

But some simply donned their beige ponchos as if it were planned.

‘Since Junhyun hyung said it would rain...’

SuPLe fans beamed at their favorite’s forecast, more reliable than any weather report.

“It’s raining.”

Fortunately, a tent sheltered us on the way to the red-carpet area.

Under umbrellas held by security, we walked onto the red carpet.

And then—

“Whoa—!”

As we stepped onto it, cheers greeted us.

SuPLe in ponchos waved, and we smiled and waved back.

“Hello—!”

Camera shutters flashed wildly. Being hit by bursts of light, I felt the awards season had truly arrived. Last year’s wrap-party was nothing compared to this.

-Yes, this is the team that dominated the charts all year! Need I say more about NewBlack~?

The MC’s playful introduction continued.

-From the special album Winter Slumber to Nak-hwa and Empire’s standout tracks, plus producing Attention and collaborating on Blue Moon with Hayley Blue, you’ve shown diverse musical activities this year.

The MC held a mic at arm’s length like a carnival barker. I caught his eye and laughed.

It was Mo Beom-ju—glasses, slight frame—our familiar variety show “Mr. Producer’s” comedic foil.

-From variety appearances on MIF and Jusehaen to acting in dramas, NewBlack has truly ascended to “Nation’s Idol” status!

As the intro wrapped, we reached the MC. We bowed, and Mo Beom-ju lowered his mic with a grin.

“Long time no see, our teachers. How is Composer Wooju?”

“We’re not sure of his news either...”

“He’s got a bad personality~”

He laughed at our response. Then we struck poses for the photo press and each took a mic.

Mo Beom-ju asked “How does it feel to attend tonight’s awards?”

“It’s hard to believe {N•o•v•e•l•i•g•h•t} awards season is here again. Feels like just yesterday we were here last year... Time flies.”

Questions flew off the cue cards. He skipped a few, deflecting sensitive ones, and we answered seriously where needed.

Then one came for me:

-You’ve had such prolific musical output this year—OSTs, collabs, special albums... Any upcoming projects?

“Projects?”

-Yes, I might join in.

Laughter rippled among the reporters.

I answered with a smile “We’d welcome you anytime, senior. But you’d have to get your producing through us now...”

-...Let’s just pretend this never happened.

While everyone laughed at Mo Beom-ju’s quip about not wanting to work with me again, I said “We do have something in the works. A fun project.”

It was the special-album concept I’d been inspired to create after Jiho’s CSAT. Company discussions had already begun, so we were ready to start soon.

“That’s top secret.”

-Ah, that’s too bad.

He wrapped up, bowed to press and fans, and gave us an encouraging “Fighting.”

“Thank you.”

“I’ll stop by the waiting room later. I have something from Justin hyung for you.”

Justin Choo claimed to be a fan, sending us a gift. Hearing his name again felt oddly pleasant.

Though we were nervous, awards season had its perks—reuniting with old acquaintances like a reunion.

“Ah!”

Back at Gocheok Dome, we spotted a familiar face right away. Jo Sa-won sunbae, wearing an elegant black dress, greeted us.

Her album this year had been a chart smash, and she’d been mentoring On The Stage trainees recently.

“Hello!”

“Haven’t you been busy? Your new single’s great.”

“Thank you. I heard you play it on Wonderful Night Radio.”

She laughed, mentioning the name-guessing quiz. Biju flinched noticeably.

“You okay?”

“Nothing... Where’s the restroom? This way?”

“Wow, Biju hyung found it on the first try!”

He seemed flustered as he headed off in the right direction.

We chatted happily with Jo Sa-won sunbae.

“Sounds like you’ve been busy teaching.”

“Yes, I never expected it, but teaching trainees before debut is rewarding. They improve so fast.”

Her eyes narrowed thoughtfully.

“Sometimes they remind me of someone else, though.”

“Is that so?”

We feigned ignorance and she chuckled.

We greeted others passing in the hallway, then—

“I say Min!”

“We say Cho!”

“Min-Cho!”

“Min-Cho!”

Up on the singer’s dais specially set beside the stage, we exchanged hellos with the nine-member Street Boys.

Their “Hollywood man~” fist-bump line made us laugh.

Other artists soon arrived; we couldn’t chat long but...

“Wow...”

LB covered his mouth in awe.

“We’re the seniors here.”

“Seniors...!”

The awards-ceremony vibe was markedly different from last year. Back then we felt like the fourth of five brothers. This year, more like second-eldest.

Aside from individual veteran artists, the groups at this ceremony mostly debuted around our time or later—Street Boys, BLINK, Serenity alongside us; Enote and High Color a year younger; and TJ Entertainment’s rookie boy group this year.

“I feel a bit empty.”

I’d heard from Taehyun that TNT was skipping all this. Company policy, but we guessed why.

-If we win, call us first. Well, after your grandma.

I recalled that conversation oddly as tINSpirit’s members, last on the red carpet, arrived at the singer’s seats. The atmosphere began to hum.

Lights spun and sparkled from the ceiling. Hundreds of thousands of lightsticks filled the vast Gocheok Dome.

“All those look like Dalbongs.”

Junhyun’s comment made sense—everywhere was a sea of Dalbong lightsticks.

‘We succeeded, our Kim Dalbong...!’

‘Dalbong!’

Every time I met their gaze, the waves of Dalbongs cheered my heart.

Paired with the cloud-shaped Soul-sticks of tINSpirit fans, they swayed half and half.

-Don’t they look like... certain obscene shapes? Fans call them F-sticks.

-They’re rock-hard. Soul-crusher.

I suppressed a laugh by tucking my head and clearing my throat. Thankfully, the lights dimmed.

“It’s starting.”

With the roar of over ten thousand voices and the BGM booming from giant amps, I felt my whole body vibrate.

My heart pounded as we huddled shoulder-to-shoulder like a flock of penguins.

At last, the first awards ceremony of 2016 began.

“Whaaaaa—!”

As cheers subsided, the opening VCR flickered on the big screen before us.

And then...

“...Huh?”

We blinked at each other.

Sparkle—sparkle.

‘The CEO?’

On the opening VCR, Representative Park Gyu-ho appeared.