In This Life, The Greatest Star In The Universe

“You cried.”

“I didn’t cry.”

At my reply, Seok-hwan hyung narrowed his eyes. Then he pointed at us with his finger and hummed.

“No matter how I look at it, your faces are all puffy from crying.”

“You say we cried.”

I looked at my brothers and asked,

“We didn’t cry, right?”

“We... we didn’t cry, Director.”

One by one came the answers from the dance carp with swollen eyes, the maknae carp, and then from Viju.

I smiled at Seok-hwan hyung, who was looking at the carps, and said,

“Look at Junghyun. If you look at Junghyun, you can tell we didn’t cry.”

“Junghyun...?”

At last, our director turned his head and wore an expression as if words had failed him.

“...”

“What’s wrong, Director?”

“You came back healthier in just an hour, Junghyun.”

They say a bit of tears are good for eye health. Junghyun’s eyes were clearer and brighter than usual.

Clearing his throat and turning his gaze back to us, Seok-hwan hyung chuckled.

“How are you supposed to go to the schedule later with eyes that puffy?”

“It’s a radio show, so it’s fine.”

“Isn’t it a video radio?”

“If we adjust the angle right, it looks like we barely cried on camera.”

I smirked and tilted my head, and the manager and the juniors stared at me.

“There’s no way anyone would think you didn’t bawl your eyes out.”

“You look genuinely sad.”

“Can I record this and save it, hyung?”

“...”

Since it was already like this, I struck a melancholic pose for Viju, who held up his phone camera.

“Give me a line too. A sad line.”

I gazed as though looking out at the sea and uttered one sentence.

“110,000 copies.”

When my brothers’ eyes grew misty, Seok-hwan hyung burst into laughter.

After laughing together for a long while, Seok-hwan hyung spoke again.

“I got the news yesterday and felt tears welling up too. If it hit me like this, imagine how much more it hit you all.”

He spoke while looking at his laptop.

“You know this isn’t the end, right? We’re predicting three times the first-week sales will go out this year.”

“Huh...”

We looked at each other.

“Three times means over 300,000 copies.”

“That’s the projection.”

“My goodness, what is happening.”

My brothers nodded in agreement.

“Don’t be so surprised. Our Mini 2, released this spring, already surpassed 200,000 copies.”

“Already?”

“This one will probably record in the high 200,000s too.”

It was an in-house forecast, but given past sales, it was likely accurate. Even at the minimum, that’s a total of 500,000 copies.

“That’s amazing. Combined, you’re distancing yourselves quite a bit from Hyper below you.”

Hyper was the boy group that debuted around 2009 under KM Entertainment when I was a trainee. They’d won awards several times and were famous for powerful, intense, sexy choreography. To think we sold more albums than those seniors...

“It’s great, but it almost feels wrong, you know?”

“Right. I’ve admired Hyper since elementary school...”

I know success doesn’t follow tenure like lottery order, but being above the seniors I looked up to as a trainee feels kind of embarrassing. Ace, Daydream, Daylight—all artists whose songs I’d chosen for end-of-month evaluations or had in my phone playlist. While I’m happy our success came quickly, it’s staggering to think we really sold more albums than them.

“I just thought of something.”

“What is it?”

Viju said seriously.

“Maybe there’s a kingdom somewhere in a world we don’t know, and the Soufflé King there tells his people to buy NewBlack’s album.”

We all applauded and laughed at Viju’s reasonable hypothesis. But the daze still hadn’t left. My head felt so foggy I wished someone would hit me—everyone but Junghyun. I felt like the protagonist of a drama titled “I Woke Up as a Popular Idol.”

“Anyway, it’s a good thing. In overall metrics, you’re right after TeenSpirit.”

Seok-hwan hyung continued.

“The problem is what’ll unfold until next year.”

“We should unplug the Internet again.”

“By year-end, idol communities and SNS will be in chaos. There are already many spreading groundless rumors.”

He said the director was consulting with a lawyer to prepare separate legal measures.

“If someone messes with you, you get it back. It’s unthinkable to be mean to others when they can’t even beat elementary kids.”

Was that a compliment or an insult?

“Be careful for a while.”

“Yes.”

“The world aches at others’ success. The more you succeed, the weirder things will attach to you. You know what to do, but in your behavior and conduct, leave no room for doubt.”

“Yes, understood.”

After repeatedly stressing it, he asked us,

“By the way, are you okay with TeenSpirit?”

“TeenSpirit?”

“TNT fans have settled down a lot since you, Woo-ju, appeared on ShinTokki.”

Some TNT fans who’d been leaving nasty comments since Masquerade had quieted down, probably because of the way the TNT members and I behaved.

“Now TeenSpirit fans are the loudest. They’re like, How are you right after TeenSpirit? How is that possible?”

“I see.”

“They’re young, so...” He searched for an explanation. “Their comments and everything are... harsh.”

“I know that. But why TeenSpirit all of a sudden?”

“I just wondered if you were on good terms with the members over there. Fortunately, you guys get along off-camera.”

We looked at each other and said,

“You don’t have to worry about that.”

“...?”

“We might be mistaken, but somehow I feel like they think well of us.”

“Really...?”

He looked unconvinced, eyes narrowing.

“That’s strange. They aren’t the type to pick favorites... Well, if that’s true, that’s a relief.”

“Does that resolve your concern?”

“To some extent.”

He nodded and said,

“Then let’s drop the album talk here.”

Proposals flew at us.

“Let’s discuss your upcoming broadcast and ad schedules.”

“Hm?”

We tilted our heads at the slim stack, and Seok-hwan hyung asked,

“What’s this?”

“It seems thinner than before.”

If Junghyun used to need both hands to hold it, now Ri-hyuk could manage with one. The album is clearly doing better than ever, yet I found the thinning proposals dubious.

“Why thinner?”

The manager laughed.

“Because from now on, we’ll focus only on the big places.”

As the manager said, the album was sailing smoothly. A week after release, it was charting in various countries. And then:

I heard our album entered the Billboard 200, not the World Albums chart as I’d thought, but the main one that only a few K-pop acts make each year.

Han-tae-hyun [(emoji)]

Han-tae-hyun [Congratulations to our popular idol! I can’t believe how far we’ve come]

Han-tae-hyun [I’m crying]

Jang Han-byeol [I’m right next to you and I’m dying laughing]

Goo Chi-beol [I raised you, Sun Woo-ju, truly]

Seok Ji-hun [No, I did]

Jang Han-byeol [What are you talking about? I’m the universe mom in this district]

Han-tae-hyun [I raised Han Woo-ju, actually]

Han-tae-hyun [So does that mean Han Woo?]

Me [Where’s your conscience?]

I laughed at who claimed to have raised whom. Those were trainee classmates genuinely sending congratulations at our success.

But on the flip side...

“Did you unplug the phone line again today?”

“...Yes.”

Whenever he visited the PR team, he’d find them holding their foreheads or looking haggard as they switched off the fax. The problem was the articles splicing in TNT and TeenSpirit keywords for clicks... The Internet was exploding, and so was the PR team. The public seemed to shrug and think, “What’s all the fuss about?”

“It’s just growing pains. Nothing to worry about.”

Deputy Hong said.

“Luckily, the general public doesn’t really notice, so you don’t need to overthink it.”

“Yes, we will.”

I wasn’t too worried; I only felt sorry for the Soufflés’ stress.

“This is awkward.”

“What is?”

Ri-hyuk, scrolling through the fan cafe, said,

“It’s a passing incident now, but if something bigger happens later, should we post cheerful photos as if nothing’s wrong, or stay unusually quiet? I don’t know which is right.”

“Exactly. If we laugh without thought, we’ll seem tone-deaf. If we stay quiet, they’ll worry.”

As our activities lengthened after debut, such dilemmas multiplied, especially as our fan base exploded. Where once a small club cheered, now it felt like the Colosseum. Figuring out these new dynamics isn’t easy. I guess we’ll learn with experience.

“Hyungs, look at this.”

“What is it?”

“The video we posted to celebrate ten million views.”

The maknae played the video.

“Oh, it’s up already.”

“We’re really scatterbrained. We forgot this too.”

Nine-year-olds in matching costumes danced with us twenty-year-olds to the Meat Song:

“Now, follow along! Meat, meat, meat!”

“Meat, meat, meat!”

Ri-hyuk, in his suspenders, let out a high note of “Meat~~~” with a flushed face, then joined the killer choreo.

“This is one of the most-watched videos by kids in Korea today.”

“Pahaha!”

We burst out laughing at the YouTube comments:

“Puhaha!”

Scrolling past, our laughter stopped at one comment that seemed to sting the Soufflés:

┕ Reasonable doubt accepted

┕ Yeah. This feels more like the original haha

┕ Haha I was thinking it couldn’t be the original until I saw NewBlack riding a unicycle

┕ The sound is different. It feels like a completely different song, not just rearranged

We put on serious expressions.

“They catch on so fast.”

“What should we do, hyung?”

“Junghyun, relax your fists and speak. No hitting comments, okay?”

Then the maknae stepped forward.

“Should we slyly report it?”

“For what reason?”

“For harassment or bullying...?”

“Who are they harassing?”

“My feelings?”

Winking as if to say “You know,” the maknae made Junghyun smile at him.

“Junghyun, take him away.”

“Yes, hyung.”

Seeing Junghyun tickle the maknae until he squealed, I smiled warmly. For a moment, we startled at the Soufflés’ detective comment, then...

“We’ve arrived, guys.”

Our schedule location came into view: the K-Net headquarters in Sangam-dong.

Today’s recording was “Show! Show! Show! Idol High School,” an idol program by K-Net. Each episode features an idol group introduction and games, targeting idol fans like HBS’s “Idol Show” we appeared on before.

“Our NewBlack is here! Wahahaha!”

The round, raccoon-like variety star Bang-Moon-soo welcomed us with a big smile.

“Oh my, so good to see you! Shall we hug?”

“Sure. How shall we do it?”

We formed a surrounding hug like a school phalanx, and he laughed heartily.

As we all smiled broadly, Bang-Moon-soo asked,

“How long has it been? Since last March?”

“About five months, I think.”

“Back then you shone on stage and I thought you’d blow up, but you really came back big.”

We’d met often on “Legendary Songs” where he was a panelist, giving us standing ovations shouting “NewBlack! My God! Jesus!” He even begged the PD to have us on his show.

“People are already setting up their big cameras downstairs waiting for NewBlack. They’re going crazy asking us to take good care of you.”

“Yes, thank you so much.”

“Looking forward to it.”

He smiled and approached the staff. Meanwhile, we toured the studio resembling a school classroom.

“It feels like when we shot the school uniform CF.”

“I really wanted to come here.”

Idol High is quite famous. Launched last year, it rivals “Idol Show,” but it’s the original idol intro program. Its buzz is strong at home and abroad, and any debut group wants to appear at least once.

“Hello!”

“Yes, hello!”

We greeted the two assistants dashing in: U-jin and Song-song, the supporting MCs alongside the main MC.

Once filming prep finished:

“Recording starts!”

The FD slapped the slate, stepped back, and the two MCs faced a dozen cameras, chatting as if in a classroom. It was a quick review corner of the week’s hot topics.

“And album news: NewBlack’s Mini 3 just entered the Billboard 200!”

“That’s great news. And recently TeenSpirit’s volunteer work with abandoned dogs made headlines. Shall we watch the clip?”

“Oh wow, is that Hwi-yeon under those small dogs? He’s smiling.”

That smile didn’t seem quite genuine, though. The cameras caught us awkwardly smiling in the corner.

Bang-Moon-soo glanced at the cue card and feigned innocence:

“Now it’s time to invite today’s special freshman.”

“One of the hottest stars right now.”

“Monsu teacher is a real fan. She’s always asked the PD to book you guys.”

He gestured at us and announced,

“According to our survey, NewBlack ranks first among kids’ favorite idols!”

School-entrance music played. Amid variety stars’ applause, we skipped in shouting “La-la-la!” into the studio.

“One, two, three!”

“Hello. We are NewBlack!”

After bowing to the cameras, we looked at the three comedians who greeted us with smiling faces.

“I really like the song. Nine Nine Nine~”

“Nine~”

As the MCs sang our song in their homespun way, we danced along.

“Last week, Daylight’s Yoo said the Nine choreography was so good she tried it herself.”

“Wow. That’s an honor.”

“She’s dieting and says Nine is ~Nоvеl𝕚ght~ the best way to lose weight. Like nine kilos in a week.”

We clapped and laughed. The MCs were delighted by our lighthearted reactions.

“You really have rich reactions, NewBla—”

“We just laugh a lot.”

“No wonder PDs pick you as favorite idols. You react to even a breeze.”

The PD nodded with a pleased smile. After a bit of playful exaggeration about our group name’s origin,

“Now it’s time for PE period! Random Play Dance.”

“Ooo... I really wanted to try this!”

Our main dancer shouted excitedly, and we all brightened.

“Look at those excited eyes.”

“It’s strange. We should be worried by now, but if we fail, we know there’s a penalty, right?”

“They won’t go easy on us.”

The maknae said,

“It’s fine. We just won’t fail.”

“Exactly.”

“We have no fear of failure.”

Bang-Moon-soo asked,

“That’s a lot of confidence.”

“Yes. We pride ourselves on our practice. No matter the song, we’re confident.”

“You say your bodies know the moves.”

“When we hear the song, our bodies move automatically.”

My brothers nodded and added their own affirmations.

Bang-Moon-soo chuckled,

“Everyone says that. ‘We’re different from other idols.’”

“Honestly, we are.”

“We’ll see if that’s true.”

Since it was our first time, we did a practice round. Though we’d joked for the cameras, we truly were confident after all that practice.

“As we said, let’s move focusing on Ri-hyuk.”

“Yes.”

To avoid chaos, we centered our movements on Ri-hyuk. We put our hands together.

“One, two, three, Meat!”

Standing in formation, we exchanged serious looks:

‘Let’s do well.’

‘We’ll get tons of footage.’

We took a deep breath waiting for the cue. The second verse of “Masquerade” started.

“Oh.”

“So synchronized.”

We moved in formation around Ri-hyuk without hesitation, pride swelling at our flawless start. Then...

“Huh...”

“Wait.”

As the songs kept changing, we got mixed up. Our bodies responded to the part, but re-forming the lines was hard. I almost thought Clay was mocking me from afar.

“Hey! Move!”

“Ah!”

Suddenly it was chaos—everyone bumping into each other—and I shouted,

“Guys, stay calm... Ah!”

Something huge barreled in and knocked me off, sending me flying nearly a meter. In slow motion, Junghyun blinked and reached out as if to say, ‘Why are you flying?’ Jiho shouted dramatically, Ri-hyuk fell trying to catch me, Viju cried, ‘Nooo!’ Then—

Thud.

Huh?

Regaining consciousness, I found myself landing in a break-fall on the floor. I opened my eyes to meet those of the production staff, MCs, and cameras staring at me from above.

“...”

In that blink, variety star Bang-Moon-soo exclaimed appreciatively:

“Wow. You really are different from other groups.”

Laughter erupted among the staff.