Online Game: I Turn Monsters Into Food 10,000x Buffs

A hearth.

Level three. He could tell by the size of it, the quality of the grates, the faint blue glow that pulsed from the embers even now, cold. His hands itched.

Midnight hopped from his shoulder to the prep table and watched him with those dark eyes as he opened his inventory.

The recipes he’d been carrying for weeks, the ones greyed out, locked behind Hearth Level 3 Required, glowed warm in his vision.

Seared Smoked Ogre Marrow Toast, Lava Golem Heart steak, Shadowroot Stew. Dozens of them, stacked in his cooking menu like gifts he hadn’t been allowed to open.

He pulled a cast-iron pan from the shelf. Set it on the grate. The metal settled with a sound like a bell being rung quietly, and something in his chest loosened for the first time since they’d left the last safe zone.

Outside, he could hear the others moving through the hall, voices bouncing off the marble, someone laughing. Elizabeth’s voice, sharp and bright, cutting through the noise about something. Berry answers defensively. The guild is settling in.

Liam pulled a bundle of dried herbs from his inventory and started crushing them in the mortar.

The smell hit him, sage and something darker, something that lived in the roots of old trees, and Midnight chirped, leaning forward to sniff the air.

"Yeah," he said quietly. "We’re home."

He lit the hearth.

The flame caught on the first strike of the match, blue at the edges, white at the centre, and the warmth that rolled off the grates was immediate. Not with heat but something older. Something that had been waiting.

Liam set the match down and looked at the hearth.

He bowed his head.

"Dear Sa-" He stopped. Cleared his throat. "Hello, Hestia. Goddess of the hearth, I, uh. Miss you." His ears twitched. "I mean, thank you for blessing us with this level three. I can’t wait to cook everything and anything."

The blue glow pulsed. Once. Twice. Then brighter, and the light pulled itself together above the embers like something gathering its breath, and a ball of light floated there, warm and gold and humming at a frequency that sat in his teeth.

Midnight chirped and turned back into her human form.

"Well." The voice came from everywhere and nowhere, low and warm and shaped like a smile. "Look at you."

The light shifted and drew closer. Liam could feel it against his face like sunlight through glass.

"I WASN’T EXPECTING PRAYERS TONIGHT!" Hestia said, and the light lurched forward like an excited dog. "Most of your kind just light the hearth and think of nothing but the food, but you BOWED, you said my NAME!" The ball of light spun in a tight circle above the embers. "Look! Look, I can form a little ball now. Are you seeing this? Are you proud of me?"

"Just being polite," Liam said.

"He says just being polite!" The light laughed, loud and crackling, like a fire catching in dry wood. "I missed you so much, little chef. Don’t ever be normal to me again."

Midnight sat closer to the hearth, her tail swished.

"And who is this? Hestia’s voice softened. Oh. Oh, she’s lovely. You already have a second? I’m surprised. You seem the type to take your time."

"Second what?"

The light pulsed, amused.

"In your harem, little wolf."

Liam stared at the light. "I don’t have a harem."

"You have a heart as well as Elizabeth the cat and now..." The light drifted closer to Midnight, who tilted her head. "This one, I like her very much. She has a strong aura."

Midnight chirped. Then, in that small, clear voice that always surprised him, she spoke.

"Midnight likes Hestia a lot, a lot, a lot." She puffed up her chest. "And Midnight loves Liam! He filled me with cream!"

The light went very still.

Liam felt the back of his neck get warm. "It was custard, I made custard."

"Inside Midnight!" Midnight bounced, smiling.

"Custard," Hestia repeated. The light pulsed slowly, like a heartbeat. "You filled her with your seed? Just like the cat? Good job!"

"She asked for it."

"Of course she did."

The light drifted closer to Midnight, who leaned into it with her whole body, eyes half-closed in what looked like pure bliss. Hestia’s voice dropped even lower, warm and private.

"You chose well, little chef. She’s devoted. I can taste it on her; she’ll follow you through anything. Keep feeding her. Keep feeding all of them. That’s what I’m here for."

The light brightened once more, then dimmed, pulling back toward the embers.

"The hearth is yours," Hestia said. "Cook well."

The light sank into the coals and was gone.

Liam stood there for a moment. The pan sat on the grate. The herbs waited in the mortar. Outside, someone dropped something heavy, and Berry shouted something about being careful, and Elizabeth laughed again, and the guild kept moving through the walls around him.

Midnight turned back into her tiny dragon form and hopped back to his shoulder and nuzzled his ear.

"Custard," he said.

"Lots of custard," Midnight agreed.

[TOOL TIP]:

Status: Chef Dignity: Completely Evaporated.

The Divine Harem Census: Goddess Hestia, manifesting as an excited, spinning golden ball of light just to immediately calculate Liam’s polygamous roster metrics, has introduced a [Goddess Approved] multiplier to the kitchen. The system notes she is thoroughly impressed by his speed run from Elizabeth to Midnight.

The Dragon’s Unfiltered Log Update: Midnight shifting into human form specifically to announce to the literal goddess of the hearth that Liam "filled her with cream" inside her system has triggered a permanent [Anatomical Vocabulary Error]. Liam’s attempt to aggressively pivot the divine terminology to "Vanilla Custard" has resulted in a 0% reduction in secondhand embarrassment.

The "Keep Feeding Them" Buff: Hestia tasting Midnight’s absolute, unhinged yandere devotion on the air currents and ordering Liam to continue filling his party members with both high-tier baked goods and genetic artillery has officially canonised his harem strategy. The server warns that his domestic lifestyle is now considered a holy crusade.