Honbul: Flame of the Soul

Myojeong, who had accepted the swaddled baby in a daze, looked down at the child with eyes full of disbelief. It was the first time he had ever held a newborn in his arms. The baby was so small and light that merely holding it felt precarious. For the first time in his life, Myojeong was seized by a strange, unfamiliar fear.

Standing there, forgetting even to breathe, Myojeong moved his lips as if entranced.

“Don’t tell me this child...”

They had said they would spare the women and children. They had said they would not kill them. But Hwirim, whom he had waited for so long, had not come. Before him stood only Iwol and a newborn he had never seen before.

And so Myojeong understood.

“If Myojeong promises me, then I will promise to return safely too.”

Just as he had, Hwirim had failed to keep her promise in the end.

The rebel forces had hidden in a mountain valley and formed a temporary village. It was land where slash-and-burn farmers had once lived long ago before abandoning it. There, Hwirim had given birth prematurely.

Of all times, the birth had come much earlier than expected, right before the planned uprising. It had happened so suddenly that there had been no time to call a midwife, and Iwol said she had delivered the baby herself.

Immediately after giving birth, Hwirim had hovered on the brink of life and death. The baby, born before its time, had also looked as if it might stop breathing at any moment, but thanks to Iwol’s seasoned, worldly care, both mother and child managed to pull through.

After giving birth, Hwirim was unable to move freely for the time being. It was difficult for her to take action right away, but fortunately, there was still time before the day of the uprising, and Hwirim was slowly recovering.

It was just when everyone had finally breathed a sigh of relief.

Fifteen days before the uprising, the government forces launched a surprise attack. By the time the news reached them, the outside world had already become a battlefield. Their base was completely surrounded, and every escape route had been blocked.

Skirmishes broke out everywhere, and flames shot up into the sky. The peaceful mountain village was devastated in an instant. The government forces ordered them to lay down their weapons and surrender, but the rebels gathered the women and children in one place to take refuge, then resolved to fight back.

Hwirim, who was a central figure and acting commander of the forces, should have joined the fight. But unfortunately, because she had given birth not long before, she could barely move. Pulled along by Iwol, Hwirim hid among the women and children with a veiled cloak drawn over her head.

The result of the unprepared battle was disastrous.

Most of those who fought against the government forces died on the spot, and the survivors were taken prisoner. But after counting the captured leaders, the government forces searched for those who remained with fire in their eyes.

“There is a woman of extraordinary skill who wields a sword while dressed as a man. She is nowhere to be seen.”

The government forces, who had learned of Hwirim’s existence through an informant on the inside, ordered her to come out at once if she wanted the survivors to be spared.

Hwirim, who had been hiding among the women with the veiled cloak over her head, heard those words, handed the baby in her arms to Iwol, and rose to her feet. At that, Iwol wept and begged her to stay still, for the child’s sake if nothing else, but Hwirim would not bend.

Entrusting the child to Iwol, Hwirim asked her to survive no matter what, gave her the pouch she carried, and told her where to go.

That was the last of Hwirim.

Afterward, Iwol was captured among the line of people being taken away as slaves. She walked for days on end before narrowly escaping when the government soldiers’ watch grew lax. After that, she wandered from place to place before arriving here.

Iwol had barely made it this far, going around day after day to beg for breast milk.

“The heavens are so cruel...”

After finishing her story, Iwol began to sob.

“To go so meaninglessly, without ever even nursing her child...”

Just as Iwol, her voice choked with sobs, wiped her tears with the ties of her clothes, the baby in Myojeong’s arms must have woken, because it burst into tears with a wail. The weeping Iwol hurriedly took the baby back into her own arms.

“Oh, you poor thing... Don’t cry. Don’t cry...”

As she soothed and calmed the baby, Iwol handed Myojeong the pouch Hwirim had left behind as her last memento. The moment he took the small cloth pouch in his hand, he felt something inside. When he checked its contents, the first thing he saw was a small object wrapped in several layers of paper. As he unwrapped the tightly bound paper, a dark, bluish pill about the size of a coin emerged.

Myojeong recognized it.

This was the merman’s pill Hwirim had once spoken of.

Staring blankly at the merman’s pill in his hand, Myojeong realized there was still one more thing inside the pouch. The other item was a decorative pendant. The very pendant he had once given her as a gift.

The pendant was exactly as it had been when he first gave it to her. It looked new, as though it had never been used. Come to think of it, he had never once seen her hang it from her scabbard. If she had truly worn it on her scabbard, there was no way it could have remained in such pristine condition. It was clear at a glance that she had treasured it.

“......”

Staring blankly down at the pendant, Myojeong murmured in a voice barely above a whisper.

“Heartless woman...”

She had lived and died not for anyone else, but solely for herself. If one could say so, it was an end that suited Hwirim.

What she had left behind were the merman’s pill, a beautiful pendant, and a child who looked just like her.

At some point, the baby had stopped crying. Iwol handed the child back to Myojeong. Myojeong looked closely at the baby. Judging by those brief cries, the child seemed very gentle and calm. When its eyes met Myojeong’s, the baby flailed its hands inside the swaddling cloth and gave a newborn’s smile.

Its features seemed to resemble Hwirim more than him.

“No one is born because they wish to be. Birth may be inevitable, but the path to death is made by humans. The question is not whether to live or die, but how one will die. So let us twist fate. Let us try, somehow, to pull one over on the world. Even if it goes against providence. You never know, do you?”

At last, a tear rolled down Myojeong’s cheek.

Iwol said she had nowhere to go anyway, and that if Myojeong would allow it, she would look after the child until it grew a little older. She had delivered the baby with her own hands, and she felt responsible for having saved the infant, who had only just been born. Above all, she thought it would be difficult for a man alone to care for a nursing child who had only just seen the light of day.

“If you would permit me, I could stay here at your home, my lord, and...”

Iwol seemed to want to remain by Myojeong’s side and help him.

“This is not my home.”

But Myojeong shook his head. Iwol’s eyes widened, as she had naturally assumed it was Myojeong’s house. Just as she was about to ask whose house it was, Myojeong spoke first.

“It is a house with no owner now, so you may live here if you wish.”

If it had an owner, that owner would have been Hwirim. But Hwirim was no longer in this world. Though the house was somewhat old, it would be livable enough if it were furnished. There was water nearby, and a small field in the yard. Even if it was a humble house, if she used it as a foundation, she would probably be able to make a life for herself.

“Huh? B-But...”

Iwol looked troubled. The rebellion had failed, but Iwol was now a completely free woman. Myojeong added that if she did not want to stay, she was free to go anywhere and live as she pleased.

“She would have wanted that too.”

Iwol asked several more times whether it was truly all right, then said she would at least act as the baby’s wet nurse until the child was weaned. If that proved too difficult, she said she would look for somewhere to entrust the child.

“I will take the child.”

Myojeong shook his head, saying there was no need for that.

“My lord, what will you do now?”

Myojeong smiled faintly without a word. He looked down at the baby in his arms, then slowly began to walk. He heard a voice calling after him from behind, but Myojeong never looked back again.

Myojeong did not have much time left.

Once this year passed and the next began, he would reach the promised age of thirty-three. Hwirim had said he had nothing to lose. If there was even one chance to twist fate, Myojeong wanted to use that chance for the child.

This was the baby born between Hwirim and him. He could neither send away the child Hwirim had left him, nor raise the child himself. But he wanted to protect it. The desperation of someone struggling not to lose the one thing left to him would surely overcome the ferocity of someone trying to possess everything.

Why did you come to this land?

To become a Bangsangsi.

Then you will live as I have.

But I did not want to give birth to you.

When he brought his finger to the tiny fist, the baby gripped Myojeong’s finger tightly.

“My child.”

With tears stinging the bridge of his nose, Myojeong smiled at the baby.

“I am sorry for leaving you in such a harsh land. But...” 𝒇𝓻𝓮𝓮𝙬𝙚𝒃𝒏𝓸𝙫𝒆𝙡.𝓬𝓸𝒎

Burying his lips and nose in the baby’s outstretched hand, Myojeong whispered.

“Welcome.”

Myojeong knew this journey would be his last.