Honbul: Flame of the Soul

Since there was no need to tell the truth, Jaegyeom decided to let it slide. After all, a handshake was a handshake. And yet, even though it was only a handshake, Yoon Taehee’s expression was incomprehensibly strange.

“...”

Yoon Taehee stared at Jaegyeom with unreadable eyes, then asked an unexpected question.

“Who tied your tie?”

“Did you tie it yourself?”

Jaegyeom suddenly wondered what nonsense he was talking about and glanced toward the doorway. Then he looked back at Taehee and answered quietly, in informal speech.

“No. Jeongju did...”

As soon as Jaegyeom answered, Yoon Taehee pushed his chair back and stood. Then, out of nowhere, he grabbed Jaegyeom’s tie. The neatly tied knot came undone in an instant.

“Why the tie all of a sudden...”

Just as Jaegyeom narrowed his eyes,

“It isn’t pretty, so I’m going to do it again.”

Yoon Taehee stepped closer and whispered.

Jaegyeom was bewildered. Whether he still had not sobered up or not, Yoon Taehee was being capricious today. Just moments ago, he had been acting distant, and now, all of a sudden, he was complaining that the tie was not pretty. Jaegyeom had no idea which rhythm he was supposed to follow. For the moment, he decided to let Taehee tie it. But whether it was his imagination or not, the hands tying the tie felt rougher than usual.

“Are you busy today?”

Worried someone might hear, Jaegyeom whispered softly. Since they were facing each other at close range, if he kept his voice low, it would be hard for anyone outside to hear.

“Yes. A little.”

Jaegyeom asked everything he had been meaning to ask.

“What time did you wake up this morning?”

“Around five.”

“Did you see my call?”

The two of them whispered to each other in secret.

“Yes, I saw it.”

“Then why didn’t you call back?”

Instead of answering, Yoon Taehee smiled faintly and asked in return.

“Were you waiting?”

Jaegyeom answered.

“Yeah.”

Yoon Taehee’s hands froze.

“...”

Jaegyeom asked another question.

“Why did you just leave without saying anything?”

Yoon Taehee, who had been silent, muttered.

“Well. Did I really need to say anything?”

His hands moved again. Jaegyeom’s brows twitched at the indifferent answer. Of course, they did not need to know every little thing about each other. But Taehee had been brought home and put to sleep in Jaegyeom’s bed, only to disappear completely. Wasn’t it only natural for the host to be curious? On top of that, no matter how long Jaegyeom waited, there had been no contact of any kind, so he had worried that something might have happened.

“Jeongju...”

Jaegyeom lowered his gaze and stared at Yoon Taehee’s hands.

“Jeongju woke up early this morning and made hangover soup without even knowing you’d left. If you were going to go, you should have told us beforehand. Jeongju went to the trouble for nothing.”

The hand tightening the knot of his tie stopped.

“...”

Yoon Taehee stood silently for a moment, then slowly smiled.

“...Is that so?”

He narrowed his eyes slightly and spoke as if this were something new to him.

“I didn’t know that either.”

There was an unknown coldness in his smiling voice.

“What should I do? Making all that effort go to waste... But then again, I suppose having someone who cares so much isn’t such a bad thing.”

Yoon Taehee looked at the tie, now neatly knotted. Then he slipped a finger between the knot and Jaegyeom’s throat.

He gently pulled Jaegyeom toward him. Jaegyeom was tugged forward, and the toes of their shoes collided.

“If he matters that much to you, why don’t you tell him the truth? That you became a Naja so you could die. Isn’t it a little cruel to leave him knowing nothing?”

Jaegyeom’s face hardened at the cold sarcasm.

“He must be so happy that you finally have the will to live... When really, doesn’t it make him pitiful? Wagging his tail like that without even imagining it means the exact opposite.”

The words were truly a tender dagger.

It felt as though cold water had suddenly been poured over him. His blood seemed to chill in an instant. Jaegyeom slowly raised his head.

Their gazes pierced each other.

At that moment, Yoon Taehee felt his heart plummet.

The boy, who had always been indifferent, was showing very clear agitation.

“...”

Jaegyeom’s eyes wavered. Because he had broken Jaegyeom’s composure exactly as he had wanted, a strange pleasure rose in Yoon Taehee’s heart.

But only for a moment.

The sand he had been holding seemed to scatter between his fingers, leaving only a fleeting sense of weight behind.

Jaegyeom said nothing. He only glared at Yoon Taehee. He looked angry, and at times he looked hurt. Yet strangely, Taehee was not satisfied. It felt as though he had struck the target and missed at the same time. An unfamiliar dissonance led to an extremely unpleasant sensation.

After a while, Jaegyeom barely moved his lips as if to speak.

“You...”

He said no more and closed his mouth. Jaegyeom took one step, then another, back from Yoon Taehee, who stood facing him, and turned away. Then he strode toward the open door. Yoon Taehee’s gaze followed the back of Jaegyeom’s head.

He thought Jaegyeom would simply leave the chief’s office.

But contrary to Yoon Taehee’s expectations, Jaegyeom did not go out. Instead of leaving, he closed the open door. Then he strode back in front of Yoon Taehee.

Jaegyeom, who had been moving away, came closer before his eyes.

Ah...

At the same time, Yoon Taehee’s heart, which had plummeted, began to beat mercilessly.

Thump, thump, thump...

The drumbeat, matching Jaegyeom’s stride, rang all the way down to his toes.

“Right. I know you’re a bastard. I know that...”

Jaegyeom, who had come back after closing the door, slapped Yoon Taehee across the cheek.

“You, you... You fucking son of a bitch...”

Yoon Taehee staggered and leaned against his desk.

“Still, you shouldn’t do this to me.”

The kind and friendly Yoon Taehee sometimes became a con artist, or a piece of trash, or perhaps something even worse. What he had once said at the bookstore had, in fact, been true.

Maybe Jaegyeom had forgotten for a moment.

Once Yoon Taehee’s mood twisted, it went endlessly off course. Sometimes he used words like blades and wielded people as he pleased. He had said ghosts preyed on people by catching them off guard and making them lower their guard. Yoon Taehee ◆ Nоvеlіgһt ◆ (Only on Nоvеlіgһt) hated Naja, but sometimes he was more like a Naja than anyone else.

Jaegyeom gritted his teeth. The end of his voice kept trembling.

“That’s right. They don’t know anything.”

He pretended not to see anything, but in truth, he saw everything. He pretended not to know anything, but in fact, he knew everything. If Jaegyeom pretended not to notice, Taehee pointed it out as if he were proud of himself. Yoon Taehee had always been like that. He struck directly at the heart without the slightest hesitation.

“But you know, you fucking bastard.”

Yoon Taehee had recognized Jaegyeom’s ennui and misfortune at a glance. Why Jaegyeom had become a Naja, and with what feelings he had taken Yoon Taehee’s hand—Yoon Taehee was the only one who knew.

Jaegyeom felt desolate, as if he had lost his buoy in the middle of the ocean.

“...”

Jaegyeom turned around. This time, it was to leave this place. He did not want to be alone with Yoon Taehee.

Just as he reached out and grabbed the doorknob, a large hand suddenly came from behind and covered Jaegyeom’s hand where it held the knob. A strong force seized him. Yoon Taehee was standing right behind him like a wall.

“Let go.”

Jaegyeom glared at the door and spoke fiercely. Yoon Taehee said nothing. He did not let go of his hand either.

“Let go.”

Yoon Taehee, who had remained silent, lowered his head after a long while. He buried his nose in Jaegyeom’s hair, then slid his head to the side. Resting his forehead on Jaegyeom’s shoulder, he opened his mouth.

“I’m sorry.”

“...”

“I made a mistake just now.”

“...”

At the unexpected apology, Jaegyeom’s shoulders stiffened. The other man buried his forehead against his shoulder and murmured in a low voice.

“I didn’t want this.”

That was the conclusion Yoon Taehee reached in that instant.

He had wanted to shake him.

It had definitely been a destructive impulse. Something that would ruin his composure. He wanted to throw a stone into a calm lake and create passionate ripples. Perhaps that desire had been close to the desire to wound.

But this was not the answer.

He had wanted to break the parallel line between them. He felt as though he could achieve something if he broke that parallel.

“I didn’t want this...”

Yoon Taehee murmured it several times. In the end, he had no choice but to admit the truth.

He had wanted to shake Jaegyeom.

But in truth, the one who had been shaken was himself.