The Scumbag's Guide To Heroism

The thought of Diane and Sloane together, both of them touching me, competing for my attention instead of tearing each other apart over me. The fantasy had a sick appeal that made me hate myself even as my body responded to the mental image.

I was exactly the kind of scumbag the System thought I was.

"Fine," I said quietly. "Tell me what to do."

〘 First stage: Allow subjects time to process initial shock. Minimum recommended cooling period is thirty minutes. Use this time to prepare approach strategy. Host should review each subject’s attachment vectors and identify optimal persuasion angles. 〙

I sat back down and opened the Oracle Feed fully, pulling up the detailed profiles on both Diane and Sloane. The information scrolled past my eyes, clinical and comprehensive.

Sloane Fitzgerald - Key Attachment Vectors:

Primary Driver: Years of suppressed romantic feelings now validated through physical intimacy. Subject experienced first sexual encounter with Host, creating powerful bonding through vulnerability and trust.

Secondary Driver: Competitive nature. Subject values winning and success. Discovery of Diane as rival triggers territorial instinct.

Tertiary Driver: Fear of abandonment. Both biological parents remain present but Subject experienced Host’s arrival as threat to maternal attention before transforming into attachment object.

Vulnerability Point: Subject values fairness and hates losing but responds positively to situations where she can win while helping others win simultaneously. Reframing of current situation from zero-sum competition to mutual benefit exploits this psychological pattern.

I read that last part twice. Sloane hated losing, but she liked it when everyone won. If I could make her see this as a situation where nobody lost, where she got to keep me and her relationship with her mom stayed intact...

It was manipulative as hell. It was also probably the only angle that would work.

Diane Fitzgerald - Key Attachment Vectors:

Primary Driver: Maternal instinct (complex). Subject views Host as both ward/son figure and sexual partner. These competing frameworks create cognitive dissonance that Subject resolves through compartmentalization. Violation of compartmentalization (Sloane’s discovery) triggers guilt response.

Secondary Driver: Professional investment. Subject has spent years grooming Host’s public image and career prospects. Host’s success reflects Subject’s judgment and capabilities.

Tertiary Driver: Sexual satisfaction and emotional fulfillment. Subject’s adult relationships have been primarily transactional and professional. Host provides genuine intimacy Subject has not experienced in years.

Vulnerability Point: Subject’s guilt regarding Sloane is surface-level emotion masking deeper fear of losing access to Host. Subject will rationalize almost any arrangement that preserves her relationship with both Host and daughter. Providing rationalization framework that allows Subject to maintain self-image while continuing affair is optimal approach.

So Diane felt guilty about hurting Sloane but didn’t actually want to stop sleeping with me. She just needed an excuse that let her keep doing it without feeling like a terrible mother.

And I was supposed to provide that excuse.

I stood up again and walked to my window, looking out at the Creston Hills neighborhood. The sun had almost set. The houses glowed with warm light. Normal families doing normal things.

Not whatever the hell this was.

My phone buzzed on the nightstand. I picked it up and saw a message from Felicity, the girl from the exam.

Felicity: Hey! Just wanted to check in. You were amazing btw totally getting in

I stared at the message, my finger hovering over the keyboard. Another girl. Another potential complication. The System probably had plans for her too. 𝒇𝙧𝙚𝓮𝔀𝓮𝒃𝙣𝓸𝒗𝒆𝒍.𝙘𝒐𝒎

I put the phone down without responding.

One crisis at a time.

The Oracle Feed updated with a notification.

〘 Cooling period complete. Recommended approach: initiate conversation with Subject Diane first. Subject is currently in her bedroom, alone. Subject Sloane remains in her room with door locked. Diane conversation establishes framework. Sloane conversation requires more delicate approach. 〙

"And if Diane tells me to fuck off?"

〘 Probability of negative response: 18.3%. Subject Diane is pragmatic and solutions-oriented. Subject will be receptive to proposal if presented correctly. 〙

I walked to my door and paused with my hand on the handle. This was it. The moment where I either committed to being the kind of person who convinced a mother and daughter to share him, or I walked away from the quest and dealt with the consequences.

Except walking away meant losing both of them. Meant being kicked out of the house. Meant that guilt modifier making every future relationship harder.

The System had structured this perfectly. There was no good option. Only a choice between bad and worse.

I opened the door and walked down the hall toward Diane’s room.

The universe, it seemed, really did have a sick sense of humor. Two months ago I’d been a transmigrant trying to figure out how to survive in a world of Heroes with a gacha system and no real power. Now I was walking toward a conversation about convincing two women who loved me to fuck me at the same time.

Progress, I supposed. If you could call it that.

I knocked on Diane’s door softly. "It’s me."

A pause. Then her voice, quiet and tired. "Come in, Lukas."

I opened the door and stepped inside. Diane sat on the edge of her bed in the same business suit she’d worn home, her shoes kicked off, her hair slightly disheveled. She looked up at me with those blue eyes, and for a moment I saw past the CEO, past the confident woman who’d been teaching me her body for two weeks.

She looked scared.

"Is Sloane okay?" I asked.

"No." Diane’s voice was flat. "She’s hurt and angry and confused. As she should be."

I closed the door behind me and leaned against it. "This is a mess."

"Yes." Diane smiled without humor. "It is."

We stood in silence for a long moment. The air between us felt heavy with unspoken things.

"I should leave," I said finally. "It would be easier if I just left."

"Easier for whom?" Diane stood up, her eyes sharp. "For Sloane? For me? Or for you?"

"For everyone. I’m the problem. Remove me and things go back to normal."

"Normal." Diane laughed, a bitter sound. "Lukas, there is no normal for us to go back to. The moment you manifested your Aspect, the moment I first touched you, the moment Sloane kissed you, we passed normal and kept going."

She walked toward me, stopping a few feet away. Close enough that I could smell her perfume. Close enough that the Musk trait was probably working on her even now.

"I’m not going to tell you to leave," she said quietly. "And I’m not going to apologize for wanting you."

"Even though it hurt Sloane?"

"Yes." Diane met my eyes without flinching. "Even though it hurt Sloane. Does that make me a terrible mother?"

"I don’t know." I rubbed the back of my neck. "Probably."

"Probably," she agreed. "But here we are."

The quest timer ticked down in my vision. 71:42:15.

This was it. This was the moment where I either planted the seed or chickened out.

"There might be a way," I said slowly. "A way where nobody has to lose."

Diane’s eyes narrowed. "What do you mean?"

I took a breath. No turning back now.

"What if we stopped pretending this had to be a choice?"