Beastmen Are Crazy, So I Sell Them Therapy

After having a hearty meal, I immediately got to work—packing orders one after another with the speed and precision of someone fueled by profit and caffeine.

Well.

Mostly precision because Gawain was here.

"Careful with that—"

CRACK.

I froze and slowly, very slowly, turned my head to check what he was doing.

Gawain was standing there, holding what used to be a perfectly carved rabbit... now missing its ears.

"...It slipped," he said.

My eye twitched. "Okay, just—put it in the box gently—"

He nodded confidently. "Got it."

THUD.

"...Why did that sound heavy?" I asked slowly.

"It’s secured," he said proudly.

I walked over and opened the box.

The wolf carving inside was upside down.

Wrapped in... was that table cloth?!

"...Where did you even get this?" I asked, voice dangerously calm.

He blinked. "You said wrap it."

"I said wrap it properly!"

"I did! It’s not moving anymore, see?"

"...Because it’s suffocating."

"It’s a stone."

"That’s not the point!"

He frowned like I was the unreasonable one. "I don’t see the problem."

I inhaled deeply, exhaled slowly, then glared at him.

"Are you trying to help... or are you secretly sabotaging me?"

He gasped. "My Lady! I would never—"

Behind him—

CRUNCH. 𝕗𝕣𝐞𝐞𝘄𝐞𝚋𝚗𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗹.𝚌𝕠𝚖

We both froze.

He slowly looked down.

He had stepped on a snake carving.

...

"...Okay that one’s on me," he admitted.

I grabbed my head. "Agatha needs to come back."

"I’m doing my best!"

"Your best is destroying my inventory!"

"I’m increasing demand through scarcity!"

"That’s not how business works!"

"It can be!"

"No it can’t!"

He picked up another piece. "This one looks fine—"

"DON’T TOUCH ANYTHING!"

He froze mid-air like a child caught stealing snacks.

Before he could fully destroy all my precious stones, I pointed dramatically at the corner. "GO. SIT. THERE."

"...That’s exile."

"NOW."

That did it.

Gawain walked over like a scolded child, plopped down, and rested his chin on his hand—mumbling to himself like he was the victim in all of this.

My ears twitched.

"You destroyed three of my works," I said, voice tight. "Do you have any idea how hard it is to find the exact color and balance to fix those?"

He froze.

Then slowly looked at me.

Puppy eyes activated.

"I’m sorry, My Lady..."

"..."

I inhaled.

Exhaled.

"...Just don’t touch anything."

He nodded quickly—too quickly.

Just then, the door opened.

Agatha stepped in, locking it behind her with a soft click before approaching us.

Her eyes swept across the room.

The mess.

The broken pieces.

Me.

Then Gawain.

Back to me.

"...What happened?"

"Don’t ask," I said flatly. "I’m still angry."

A pause.

"...Understood."

I gestured toward the table.

"You handle the packaging. I’ll fix these—or carve new ones."

Agatha gave a small nod and immediately got to work.

And just like that—

Order was restored.

Boxes aligned perfectly.

Wrapping precise.

Labels straight.

Meanwhile, I sat down with the broken pieces, examining them like a surgeon deciding whether to save a patient... or declare them dead.

"...This one’s salvageable."

I picked up the rabbit with missing ears.

"...This one’s not."

I looked at the completely cracked snake carving then slowly turned my head toward the corner.

Gawain stiffened. "...I can feel that look," he muttered.

"You should."

"I said I was sorry..."

"And yet the damage remains."

"I can compensate!"

"With what? Your existence?"

"...That hurts."

"Good."

Agatha, without even looking up, spoke calmly: "My Lady, shall I add the cost of damages to his ’debt’?"

Gawain gasped. "DEBT?! Since when do I have debt?!"

I didn’t even hesitate. "Since five minutes ago."

"That’s unfair!"

"You stepped on a snake!"

"It attacked my foot!"

"It was a statue!"

He slumped further into the corner. "...I’m being bullied."

"No," I corrected while picking up another stone, already starting to carve again. "You’re being charged."

Agatha nodded in approval. "Fair and just."

"...I want a different workplace," Gawain whispered.

Without looking at him, I smirked slightly. "Denied."

~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

After packing all the orders—successfully this time, thank you very much—I immediately ordered another batch of energy stones from the Imperial Stone Archives.

Ten stones per day.

...

That wasn’t enough.

Not even close.

My shop was basically screaming:

"RESTOCK OR PERISH."

I leaned back in my chair, staring at the ceiling.

"...Demand is rising."

My tail flicked.

"And I’m under-supplied."

A tragic story.

A very profitable tragedy.

I crossed my arms.

"I can’t just ask Soren..."

Because what was I supposed to say?

Hey Soren, can I borrow your energy stone mines? No big deal, just trying to build my empire real quick.

...

Yeah.

No.

Even I had standards.

Low standards.

But still—standards.

"I would be absolutely shameless if I did that," I muttered.

From the corner, Gawain raised a hand.

"You already threatened to sell me as a decorative item."

So I searched for websites that sells raw energy stones even if it’s low quality.

"That was business."

"That was emotional damage."

"Same thing."

He went quiet.

Smart choice.

I turned back to my OmniSync and began searching.

"Alright... options..."

Auctions

Marketplaces

Guild suppliers

...shady websites (tempting, but I like being alive)

StrataLink resellers (overpriced, disgusting behavior)1

I scrolled.

And scrolled.

And scrolled—

"...Wait."

My ears perked up when I remembered something...

Something familiar.

"Where did we go again... to pick my own energy stone..."

I tapped my chin.

Think.

Think.

Think—

"Quantum..."

My eyes widened.

"Quantum Core Guild!"

I sat up straight so fast my chair almost fell.

"That’s it!"

Gawain blinked. "Is that a place or a threat?"

"Both, if they overprice their stones."

I immediately typed it into the search bar and a second later—

"There!"

They had a website.

I leaned closer, eyes sparkling like I just found buried treasure.

"...If they allow bulk purchases..."

My tail swished faster.

"...then I just solved my supply problem."

From behind me—

"So... we’re not robbing anyone?" Gawain asked.

"Not yet."

"...That ’yet’ concerns me."

I didn’t answer him as I cracked my fingers. "Time to negotiate."

Agatha, who had been silently organizing the last of the packages, spoke without looking up—

"Shall I prepare a formal request, My Lady?"

I grinned. "No," my eyes gleamed menacingly. "I’ll handle this one personally."

Gawain leaned back. "...Someone’s about to get bullied professionally."

Agatha nodded. "...May the guild rest in peace."

I contacted the guild.

Honestly?

This part was the easiest.

Negotiating?

Please.

I practically grew up watching contracts get torn apart and rebuilt over tea.

I leaned back in my chair, tail swaying lazily as I typed.

————————————

To: Quantum Core Guild

Good day.

I am a high-volume carver currently sourcing energy stones for continuous production. I’ve reviewed your inventory and I am interested in establishing a long-term purchasing agreement.

However, your current listed prices are...

Unfavorable.

Given the scale of my demand, I expect an adjusted rate suitable for bulk acquisition. If not, I will be forced to consider alternative suppliers.

I trust your guild understands the value of retaining consistent, high-output clients.

I await your response.

————————————

I tapped send.

Gawain leaned over my shoulder, squinting at the screen like he just discovered a new species. "Wow... You sound so rude and arrogant here."

I turned to him. "What do you mean arrogant? This is how I usually talk to my clients."

He frowned. "What clients?"

"...Excuse me?" I blinked, offended. "Go to StrataLink and search Crimson Snow Atelier, that’s my shop."

He immediately pulled out his OmniSync and searched.

A second later—

"...Whoa."

His eyes widened.

"Not only is My Lady a carver but also a businesswoman!"

I smirked, clearly pleased.

"Obviously."

Then—

He froze.

Completely.

Utterly.

Suspiciously still.

"...What?" I narrowed my eyes.

He slowly turned the screen toward me.

"My Lady..."

A pause.

"...Just what are you replying to your clients...?"

"...What do you mean?"

"...to the point where they leave this many negative ratings?"

I grabbed his device and casually scrolled through the ratings.

————————————

Rating: ★

"Seller told me to ’develop better taste’ after I asked for a discount."

Rating: ★★

"Product is AMAZING but seller is terrifying. I felt like I was being judged the entire time."

Rating: ★★★★★

"I asked if she could rush my order and she replied ’I’m not your servant.’ (cry emoji)

Rating: ★★★

"High quality but communication feels like you’re talking to a villain."

Rating: ★

"She said ’if you can’t afford it, don’t buy it.’ I mean... fair... but still???"

————————————

I can’t help but frown, my eyebrows slowly raising, and my expression hardened into something that could probably scare off wild beasts.

Gawain gasped like he just witnessed a horror scene. "RIGHT NOW! THAT FACE!"

I slapped his finger away.

"What face?"

"My Lady!" he cried dramatically, grabbing my cheeks out of nowhere.

I froze. "...What are you—"

Before I could finish, he started massaging my face like I was some kind of stress-relief dough.

"Please remember to always smile!" he said, stretching my cheeks upward. "Even when someone insults you—just smile and ignore it like a noble lady that has great temperament!"

"Whash cha shell ish wrong wish yoush?!!!"

Translation: WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!

I tried prying his hands off.

I really did.

But for some reason, this idiot had the grip strength of a determined life coach.

I turned my eyes desperately toward Agatha.

Help me.

Explain him.

End him.

Something.

Agatha watched for a moment then calmly spoke. "I’m sorry to say this, My Lady... but you have a... resting bitch face."

"..."

’Did my maid just sided with this crazy guy right now?’