Beastmen Are Crazy, So I Sell Them Therapy

Soren’s golden eyes scanned his surroundings, landing finally on the small, albino leopard curled up nearby. His sharp gaze softened slightly at the sight—the drooping ears, the lowered head—it looked so... pitiful.

He was still caught in the tail end of ’Hysteria,’ a mental fog that made the world blur and twist. Confusion swirled in his mind, but even through that haze, he could tell one thing: the little beast had licked his wounds.

That tiny creature, at most the size of his paw when he was in dragon form, had tried to help him.

’Was it trying to wake him up?’ Soren tilted his head slightly, studying the leopard. Such a fragile, pitiful thing. Probably still a cub, still tangled up in its emotions.

Hysteria was... common, though dangerous, in the beast world. It forced beastmen into extremes.

On one hand, when a beastman’s emotions spiked—especially during heat—they could transform into their adult form. In this state, consciousness faded entirely, leaving them wild and uncontrollable, capable of destroying anything in their path.

On the other hand, when a beastman’s mood sank to abnormally low levels, they could regress into a cub—helpless, fragile, and easily overwhelmed.

Even Soren, with his legendary self-control, wasn’t immune. He knew the signs creeping in the edges of his mind and had done everything possible to suppress it. That was why he had fled here, to this tiny, desolate island marked long ago on the map, trying to keep both himself and everyone else safe.

’Then why was this little beast in front of him?’

The thought barely formed in Soren’s mind before the Hysteria began swallowing it whole. The clarity in his golden eyes blurred, consciousness unraveling like silk caught in a storm. He could feel control slipping, thread by thread.

The little beast was in danger!

Instinct took over. He stretched out a hand and placed it on the little leopard’s furry head.

The fine fluff brushed against his palm like a fleeting moment of calm. His hand trembled slightly as he tried to suppress the storm within, rubbing the cub’s head as though he could will the danger away.

Then, almost automatically, his grip slid down to the back of the leopard’s neck. A firm grasp then with a single, sharp motion, the little leopard flew through the air.

’Feline body... flexible... should be fine... right?’

The thought flickered briefly before Hysteria surged again. There was no time to confirm. Soren lost control completely. His body erupted, growing, expanding, bones cracking into impossibly massive scales. He was a dragon again, wings slicing the air like storm clouds.

He beat the sky with them, shaking off whatever shred of calm remained. His claws raked at his own scales, trying desperately not to breathe fire, trying desperately not to unleash hell on the world below.

~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

I was flying...?

I was freaking flying!

What the hell just happened?! One second I was sitting there, trying not to drool over the dragon guy’s... well, blood situation, and the next—WHAM!—he grabbed me by the scruff of my neck and hurled me into the air like I was some kind of oversized furball toy.

The wind whipped past my ears, tail streaming behind me. My stomach did that very undignified flip-flop that only happens when your life flashes before your eyes.

"Oh no, oh no, oh no!" I screamed in my head, legs flailing and paws splayed.

I didn’t even get a chance to think about why he was so angry.

Maybe it was my fault for licking his wounds?

Maybe that counted as some kind of offense in dragon beastman etiquette?

Or maybe I just picked the absolute worst moment to try to show empathy.

Whatever the case, I was now airborne, helpless, and very, very pissed off at my own life choices.

Thanks to my feline senses, I could track the wind currents and calculate my landing. Somehow, with the poise only a cat could manage, I spiraled midair and landed neatly on top of a tree.

Meanwhile, somewhere above me, Soren was battling his own Hysteria. His massive golden eyes searched the horizon for the little beast he had just flung. He saw me settle into a huge bird’s nest perched precariously in the next tree. 𝐟𝕣𝕖𝐞𝐰𝕖𝚋𝐧𝗼𝚟𝐞𝕝.𝗰𝐨𝐦

I glared at him from the nest, ears flattened, tail flicking. "Really? Really?! THIS is how you deal with ’I’m worried about your safety’?" I hissed under my breath. Although I know it was useless since he probably doesn’t understand and just saw me roaring and growling at him.

I looked around and—oh, sweet, miraculous heaven—I cried out in pure joy.

Food!

Finally, actual food! My heart raced as I hugged the two eggs I’d found like they were priceless treasures.

Victory was mine!

My mouth watered. My paws twitched. I was a predator on top of the world—or, well, a cub pretending to be a predator.

I excitedly bit down on the first egg as my stomach growled.

And my canine got stuck.

I tugged. I twisted. I chewed. Nothing.

The eggshell was still in perfect condition, mocking me.

I flailed my claws at it, slashing and raking like a tiny, furry demolition crew, but the stubborn eggshell didn’t even flinch.

"Ah, damn it!" I growled, tail lashing. "I found easy food for the second time today, and I still can’t eat it?! Damn this body!"

I abandoned the eggs for a moment, pacing the nest like a miniature, furious general. Maybe there was something around I could use—rock, stick, fallen branch—something to smash the eggs open.

Nothing. Not a single thing.

I craned my neck, peering toward the ground below.

’Should I just drop them?’ I thought for a moment before shaking my head. ’Nah... that’d be a waste!’

So there I was, crouched in the nest, muttering to myself and poking at these eggs like the world’s most frustrated breakfast chef.

I was so busy figuring out how to eat my precious eggs that I didn’t notice Soren watching me. The dragon, who had just gone through a hellish episode of scale-tearing Hysteria, now looked over at me. Somehow, the chaos in his golden eyes had cleared just enough to see... me, the ridiculous little albino leopard, fumbling with two eggs.

A rare, fleeting smile curved his lips. He flapped his wings and shifted slightly closer to the tree.

I suddenly froze when the sound of flapping wings got louder. The scent of blood grew stronger.

My head whipped around. Golden eyes. Gigantic wings. And somehow, the dragon was approaching me.

’Oh shit,’ I thought, tail puffing in alarm. ’Did he... understand what I was yelling at him?!’

I froze, eyes wide, and tried to look innocent—like a small, harmless leopard cub that definitely didn’t curse him earlier.

Soren didn’t speak since he didn’t have the luxury. He had no idea how long his clarity would last before his Hysteria would surge back again.

So, with a graceful, terrifying motion, he stretched out his claws, hooked the edge of the nest, and gently lifted the nest down to the ground.

Then, without waiting for me to protest or react, he flapped into the sky, leaving me blinking at the ground like a kid who had just been handed a fragile new toy.

This sickness called ’Hysteria’ of the empire was... well, terrible. Absolute chaos. But, thankfully, it wasn’t endless. There was a time limit, and Soren had one advantage: an energy stone strapped to him that calmed his Hysteria—at least a little.

Only, as he got stronger, the stone didn’t do much anymore. It was like giving a toddler a sippy cup and expecting them to survive a hurricane. He kept flipping uncontrollably between human and his dragon form.

And yes, that energy stone was a masterpiece of the empire’s finest sculptor, carefully tailored to his beast shape. But apparently, masterpieces only go so far when you’re a giant, clawed, fire-breathing dragon with mood swings.

I watched silently from the ground as the dragon flew far away. Then, with a thunderous crash, he landed again, this time fully in dragon form. The sheer noise rattled my teeth. His huge head tilted toward me, golden eyes glinting, claws digging into the earth.

Before he could revert to human, a small breath of orange flame escaped his maw. It wasn’t dangerous—just a little puff—but warm, almost comforting. Compared to the wildfire still raging on the mountain in the distance, this was like a candle against a volcano.

I looked down at the nest and at the man lying beside the faint flames.

Perfect timing.

’I think I finally know how to cook these bothersome eggs,’ I thought, tail flicking in determination.

Carefully, I stretched my paws and nudged the eggs out of the nest. Rolling them, I positioned them right in front of the man.

Thinking fast, I nudged him gently to check if he’s still alive. Still intact.

Next, I dug a shallow pit next to the fire, carefully shoving the eggs inside, I buried them just enough to keep the heat trapped.

The hunger gnawed at me, but patience was a virtue—or at least, that’s what I told myself as I dragged dry branches from the nest and carefully guided the fire over the soil layer.

Flames licked the earth, reflecting golden light across my fur. I crouched beside it, the glow warming me softly.

Patience. Patience. Patience.

After a while, I shifted the fire to the other side, endured the heat, waited until the ground cooled enough... then dug up the eggs. My stomach growled again.

I licked my lips.

Carefully, I picked up an egg and smashed it against a nearby stone. The shell gave way easily, revealing the steaming, soft white inside. Head buried, I devoured it like it was the finest delicacy in the land.

Why eat it raw when you’ve got a perfectly good human-style "stove" right here?

I purred quietly as I devoured it, small paws gripping my prize.