Infinite Cashback System

Alexis pushed through the bathroom door and locked herself in the furthest stall. Her hands shook as she pulled out her phone.

Stupid. So stupid. Why did she say that out loud?

Her fingers moved on autopilot. She opened Twitter. Not her main account. The burner she used when she needed to scream into the void without consequences.

@goldengrl_anon

Why does the universe hate me? Found a guy who’s actually hot and has an actual personality but he used to be the BIGGEST simp on campus. Like spent 3k on a Prada bag for his ex levels of pathetic. And now he’s suddenly not pathetic??? How is that fair. How is that LEGAL.

She hit tweet. Watched the notification pop up. Three seconds later her phone exploded with responses.

@bradchadington69: damn babe u single? i got money 💰

@alpha_mike_romeo: sounds like u just want an excuse to get with him lol women are so obvious

@nice_guy_347: why do girls always go for assholes instead of nice guys like me

Alexis’s stomach twisted. She scrolled through her DMs next. Maybe someone had sent something worth reading.

Nope.

Brad C: hey beautiful. wanna get coffee sometime? ill pay

Mike R: ur hot. wanna hook up?

Every single message reduced her to body parts and price tags. Every single one assumed she could be bought with coffee or compliments or emoji fire.

The male species was genuinely disgusting.

She started typing another tweet.

Why do men think basic human decency equals flirting. Why do they think "hey beautiful" is a personality. Why do they all smell like they bathed in chemical warfare.

Her thumb hovered over the tweet button.

The bathroom door slammed open.

Voices. Giggling. Kumiko and Chloe.

Alexis locked her phone. Shoved it in her clutch.

She needed to leave. Right now. Before they cornered her for girl talk and feelings and whatever other emotional processing they wanted to force on her.

"Alexis?" Kumiko’s voice carried that bright, cheerful quality that came from exactly two and a half shots of soju. "Are you in here?"

Alexis stayed silent. Maybe they’d assume she left.

"I saw her heels under the stall." Chloe sounded steadier than Kumiko but still loose around the edges. Looser than usual.

Great.

Alexis unlocked the stall door. Pushed it open.

Both girls stood by the sinks. Kumiko leaned against the counter with flushed cheeks and slightly mussed twin tails. Chloe had one hip cocked against the wall. Her blue streak caught the fluorescent light.

"Hey." Kumiko smiled. Wide. Genuine. "Are you okay?"

"I’m fine."

"You sure? You seemed upset."

"I’m not upset. I just needed to use the bathroom."

Chloe’s eyes narrowed. "You’ve been in here for like six minutes."

"So?"

"So that’s a long bathroom break."

Alexis turned to the sink. Ran cold water over her hands. She needed to cool down. Get her composure back. Return to the booth and pretend that catastrophic slip of the tongue never happened.

"I think you like him." Kumiko’s voice came out soft. Teasing.

"I don’t like anyone."

"You described Jordan perfectly."

"That wasn’t Jordan. That was a general type."

"A general type that exactly matches Jordan." Chloe pushed off the wall. Walked closer. "Including the singing thing you just discovered tonight."

Alexis dried her hands. The paper towel disintegrated under her grip. "So what if it matches Jordan? Lots of guys match that description."

"Name one."

"I don’t have to name anyone."

"Because you can’t." Kumiko giggled. Actually giggled. "It’s okay to like someone Alexis."

"I don’t like him."

"Then why are you hiding in the bathroom?"

"I’m not hiding. I’m using the facilities."

"For six minutes."

"Why are you timing me?"

Chloe stepped between Alexis and the door. Not blocking. Just present. "Look. I get it. Jordan’s confusing right now."

"I’m not confused."

"He used to be different. Used to be the guy who bought that stupid bag."

Heat flared in Alexis’s chest. "Can we not talk about the bag?"

"Why not? You brought it up yesterday."

"That was different."

"How?"

"It just was."

Kumiko hopped up to sit on the counter. Her legs swung back and forth. "I think he’s really cute. The singing thing was so romantic."

Something cold settled in Alexis’s stomach. "You like Jordan?"

"I mean. Maybe? He’s really nice." Kumiko tilted her head. Smiled. "A man who can sing is basically a cheat code."

The cold spread through Alexis’s ribs.

Jordan had a type. Sweet. Driven. Family oriented. Someone who helped him become better.

Kumiko fit that description perfectly. She was sweet enough to give cavities. She pursued her cosplay career with actual passion. She talked about her parents constantly.

Meanwhile Alexis was cold and calculating and spent most family dinners checking her phone under the table.

"But." Kumiko’s voice dropped. Quieter. "It seems like you and Jordan have something going on?"

Chloe’s expression went carefully blank. "We’re just neighbors."

"Neighbors who arrived together. Holding hands. Looking at each other like that."

"Like what?"

"Like you know something we don’t." Kumiko’s smile turned knowing. "Did something happen?"

"No."

"Really? Because the vibe I’m getting says otherwise."

Alexis watched Chloe’s face. Watched for the tell. The micro-expression that would confirm or deny.

Nothing.

Chloe kept her expression smooth. Professional.

"Nothing happened." Chloe pushed off the sink. "We’re just friends."

"Friends who do what exactly?"

"Watch anime. Eat takeout. Normal friend stuff."

Kumiko pouted. "You’re no fun when you’re being secretive."

"I’m not being secretive. There’s nothing to tell."

"Then you won’t mind if I pursue Jordan?"

The bathroom air got thick.

Chloe’s jaw tightened. Just for a second. Then relaxed. "Do whatever you want."

"Really?"

"Really."

"So if I asked him out you’d be fine with that?"

"Why would I care?"

"Because you’re totally into him."

"I’m not into anyone."

Alexis’s headache intensified. This conversation was giving her whiplash. Kumiko liked Jordan. Chloe claimed not to like Jordan but clearly did. And Alexis had accidentally described Jordan as her perfect type in front of everyone including Jordan himself.

This was a disaster.

A complete and total disaster.

"Can we go back?" Alexis headed for the door. "Leo’s probably wondering where everyone went."

"Oh my god Leo." Kumiko wrinkled her nose. "Why does he wear so much Axe? It’s like he bathes in it."

"I don’t know and I don’t care."

"He keeps trying to flirt with you."

"I noticed."

"Are you into him?"

"Absolutely not."

"Then why don’t you just tell him to stop?"

"Because that would be rude."

Kumiko laughed. "Since when do you care about being rude?"

Since never. Alexis didn’t care about being rude. She cared about maintaining appearances. About not causing scenes. About keeping her reputation pristine.

Telling Leo to fuck off would cause drama. Drama led to gossip.

Better to tolerate the Axe smell and terrible flirting than risk her social standing.

"I just want to go back to the booth." Alexis pushed through the door before either girl could stop her.

The hallway smelled like fried food and soju. Karaoke music bled through the walls from other rooms. Someone was murdering a Billie Eilish song three doors down.

Her heels clicked against the tile floor. Each step measured. Controlled.

Kumiko and Chloe followed behind her. Close enough to catch up but far enough to give space.

"Hey Alexis?" Kumiko’s voice came out softer. "I’m sorry if I made things weird."

"You didn’t."

"I kind of did though."

"Drop it."

"But I just wanted to say that whoever you like is valid."

The words hit wrong. Scraped against something raw inside Alexis’s chest.

She stopped walking. Turned around.

Kumiko nearly crashed into her. Her eyes went wide.

"I don’t like Jordan." Alexis kept her voice level. Cold. "I don’t like anyone. I just described a type. That’s it. That’s all it was."

"Okay."

"Stop reading into things that aren’t there."

"I said okay."

"Good."

Alexis turned back around. Kept walking toward room seven.

Her phone buzzed in her clutch. Probably more disgusting DMs from guys who thought hey beautiful counted as conversation.

The male species was genuinely terrible at basic human interaction.

Except.

Jordan had sung Careless Whispers with actual emotion. With vulnerability. With that voice that shouldn’t exist on someone who looked like that.

And he’d smelled good when they sat in the booth earlier. Cedar and something clean. Not Axe. Not cheap cologne. Just clean.

And he’d described his type as sweet and driven and family oriented. Not blonde. Not rich. Not any of the surface qualities she possessed.

Which meant she wasn’t his type.

Which was fine.

Totally fine.

She didn’t care.

Alexis pushed through the door.

The booth looked the same. Kyle and Leo sat on one side laughing about something. Jordan sat on the other side alone. His phone was face down on the table.

His head lifted when she walked in. Those hazel eyes tracked her movement across the room.

"You good?" His voice carried that same quality from the stage. Smooth. Rich.

Alexis slid into the booth. Put space between herself and everyone else. "I’m fine."

"You sure? You seemed upset."

"I wasn’t upset. I just needed air."

"In the bathroom?"

"The bathroom has air."

Jordan’s mouth twitched. Almost smiled. "Fair point."

Leo grabbed the soju bottle. "More drinks?"

"No." Alexis’s headache pounded behind her eyes. The Axe smell was making it worse. "Actually I think I’m going to head out."

"Already?" Kumiko pouted as she slid into the booth. "But we just started."

"It’s almost eleven. I have a thing tomorrow."

"What thing?"

"A thing. Personal thing."

Kumiko’s expression fell. "Oh. Okay."

Guilt twisted in Alexis’s stomach. She ignored it. Stood up. Grabbed her clutch.

"I’ll see you guys later."

"Let me walk you to your car." Jordan stood too.

"I’m fine."

"I know. I’ll walk you anyway."

Something in his tone made arguing pointless. Alexis nodded. Headed for the door.

She could feel everyone’s eyes on her back as they left the room.