How I Accidentally Built a Kingdom

Welcome back everyone!

Did you miss me?

Yeah, you did.

You can’t deny it, my storytelling skills are the absolute best. I’m not taking anything away from my darling wife, but it is pretty hard to compete with me in this area.

The mere fact that you guys even compare her skills to mine, means that she is clearly very skilled.

Which is obviously true.

I mean I fell in love with her.

I am not smug.

I’m simply honest.

You said you loved my sincerity, didn’t you?

Anyway, today I’m going to skip ahead a bit, I mean I doubt you guys want to hear how me and Julia spent that night.

I mean we mostly just slept.

Yes, we simply slept in each other’s arms.

Absolutely nothing else happened that night.

We slept for the entire night.

No funny business keeping us up until almost dawn.

I am being subtle aren’t I?

What?! You’re being sarcastic? Since when do you do sarcasm?

Anyway I’m going to start this session’s story off on the day after Julia’s chat with Darvel.

Just to make it clear, the chat that happened because of me, which indirectly still makes me responsible for the outcome.

Don’t you agree?

***

That morning I might have woken up, but I was definitely still in a dream.

I mean how would any of you react if you woke up in the morning with a naked goddess in your arms.

She had this insanely cute, almost inaudible snore.

It was so cute in fact, that I just lay there listening to it for minutes.

My eyes couldn’t leave her.

Even in her sleep, Julia could capture every single ounce of my attention.

I knew that if I didn’t move immediately, I wouldn’t be able to force myself to even attempt to leave that room for the entire day.

And would you be able to blame me for it?

So I silently, and gently slipped off the bed, trying my best not to wake the sleeping beauty.

And of course I was completely successful.

As you guys know by now, I’m always successful in all endeavours.

The fact that she woke up anyway, was a complete coincidence.

It’s not at all that I made a massive ruckus when I slipped on my own clothes lying next to the bed.

"Where are you going this early?" She asked as she sat up, rubbing the sleep from her eyes.

Now I would like to point out that the view I had at that moment was absolutely magnificent.

"I have to start looking for some other avenues of income," I said as I leaned over to give her a kiss.

I didn’t even really think about doing it, it just seemed that those lips were calling my name.

They were like a beacon on the shore calling a sailor that has been adrift for weeks home.

"I don’t think you need to be too hasty about that," She whispered into my ears. "Now come back to bed, there’ll be more than enough time for future preparations in a couple of hours."

Dear god, this woman was trying to have me end up in hell.

The sins I imagined committing with her were... extraordinary.

Her words were like those of a siren calling me to my doom.

But of course I’m a man of principles.

I would never give in to temptation so easily.

I had work to do after all.

My bar wasn’t going to fund itself.

So a couple of hours later I strolled out of our room, with a massive smile on my face.

I had dominated my temptations after all, any man would be quite... pleased with that situation.

I was strolling down the stairs of the inn, whistling a tune that I can’t even remember. A pep in my step that hadn’t been there the previous afternoon, after our meeting with Darvel.

When I arrived on the ground floor, a charming little elven waitress stopped me before I could leave.

I wanted to explore the little village some more.

We had been here for almost two days after all, and the furthest I had come from our room was Darvel’s office.

I figured it might be time to do some more market research.

It had nothing to do with me wanting to see some more elven girls in summer dresses.

Why would I need that when I had just woken up next to a naked beauty mere moments ago.

"Mr. Daniel?"

"That’s me," I nodded.

The girl seemed stunned for a moment, but who could blame her, I was wearing my standard dazzling smile after all.

"Come on girl, spit it out." I heard the voice of an angel say from behind me.

I turned my head to find Julia standing on the last step, looking at the girl with a very serious expression.

I don’t know if the poor girl had done something to upset Julia, but she was getting no forgiveness from her at all.

"Right!" the girl squeaked, her cute elven ears turning a shade of red when she looked back at me. "Mr Darvel would like to speak to you again sir."

Obviously after I heard these words my naturally charming smile was replaced by something a bit colder.

"What does he want?" I asked.

Maybe I was a bit colder than was strictly necessary, but that asshole had really pissed me off, and every time I thought of how he treated Julia, I tended to become just as pissed off again.

This unfortunately affected my sunny disposition a bit, which led to the poor girl turning quite pale.

"I, I, I don’t know, sir." She stammered out.

I felt bad about how I treated her, so I patted her head, which led to those cute ears turning even redder. 𝚏𝗿𝗲𝐞𝐰𝚎𝕓𝐧𝚘𝘃𝗲𝐥.𝐜𝚘𝕞

"Okay, okay, no need to be so nervous," I said, as I kept patting her head. "Just tell me where that ass... ahem... where I can find him, and I’ll go and speak with him."

I don’t know why, but I could swear the temperature in the room dropped significantly as soon as I started rubbing the poor girl’s head.

I’m pretty sure I even heard a beastly growl echo around the room.

I tried looking around to find the threat, but I couldn’t see anything.

I did however have a feeling that if I didn’t stop touching that girl immediately, she might be in imminent danger.

Why that was I had no idea, but I had grown to trust my instincts over my life, and I believed that that situation would be no different.

So I decided to immediately stop rubbing the poor girl’s head, and step back a few paces.

As soon as I did that, the dangerous vibe in the room immediately disappeared.

"So, where can I find him?" I asked.

***

You did too growl.

You should have seen it guys, it was terrifying.

And kind of a turn on.

Anyway, that’s all we have time for today.

In our next session I’ll tell you about my second meeting with Darvel, and my amazing negotiation skills.