My Family's Secret Website

Sohen remained in the entryway as if she alone could explain... what had just happened.

The door behind his mother was already closed... a soft click, and it was all over, as if she had never been there.

All that remained was the feeling that someone had erased an important chunk of reality with an eraser and hadn’t even apologized.

- (Me). "What... was that?"

After those words, an almost simultaneous sound came from three different places, and a few seconds later, several pairs of feet began moving in his direction.

Three different rhythms and three different presences quickly appeared beside him.

Sohen stopped staring at the ceiling, lowered his head, and saw his family standing before him.

Standing before him were Runo, Karin, and Phoebe.

Runo stands slightly ahead and looks at the young man with concern.

The others stand a little behind, and as the matriarch of the household, they look at Sohen with a certain note of sympathy.

- (Karin). "She... left?"

- (Me). "Yes..."

Runo tenses slightly upon hearing this.

For a second, her face loses that controlled composure, and something seems to crack beneath the surface.

- (Runo). "Did you believe her when she said she was your biological mother?"

- (Me). "Yes... There wasn’t a single word of falsehood from her..."

- (Phoebe). "What did she say?"

- (Me). "..."

Sohen didn’t know how to start the story properly, so... he recounted everything he’d heard in chronological order, recalling some details from the past.

...

Over the next fifteen minutes, he told his beloved relatives almost all the key details, though he decided to keep some things to himself.

(Another time...)

All three listened carefully to Sohen, and each seemed to have formed their own opinions, which they voiced on the spot.

Each took in the facts in their own way, but the young man noticed that something was off with Runo; however, he decided not to dwell on it, as he thought it might just be her emotions.

In the end, Karin, Phoebe, and Runo accepted Sohen’s decision to sort out the situation in more detail and talk to his biological mother at least one more time. But then, seeing the state their beloved man was in... they decided not to bother him any further and offered their help if he needed it.

Sohen thanked them, got up from the floor, and went to his room.

As soon as he was alone... his next few days turned into something between depression and apathy.

Sohen spent the rest of that "fateful" day sitting on the edge of the bed, staring at a single point and trying to make sense of a world that had just fallen apart.

(Mom is alive... Amnesia... Time... Sleep... A strange woman... A strange woman? If I recall correctly...)

- (???). "Sohen... DETINUER YLURT EB YLLANIF LL’EW NEHT DNA NOOS EREHT EB LL’I ,EM ROF TIAW .UOY EES YLLANIF OT YPPAH SI REHTOM RUOY..."

It was precisely these strange words that came to mind when, about half a month ago, in a very realistic dream, he saw a very beautiful red-haired woman who looked... very much like Minju.

(Could it really have been... her?) 𝒻𝘳𝘦𝘦𝘸ℯ𝒷𝘯𝘰𝑣ℯ𝑙.𝘤𝑜𝘮

- (Me). "Phew... What a turbulent month this has been..."

...

The next day began with... him not feeling any better.

His desire to exercise had faded for the time being, and even his grandmother’s personal morning "assistance" with her mouth no longer brought him any pleasure.

- (Me). "Not this time, Grandma. I’m sorry..."

- (Runo). "I understand..."

After that conversation with his biological mother, he notices that he no longer has a classic "emotional state."

There is no sadness, no shock, and not even confusion in the usual sense.

It’s something more drawn-out and less clearly defined... as if his psyche had lost its inner contours and was now held together only by inertia.

There are no clear thoughts in his head, only fragments: the face of a woman who looks familiar and yet completely foreign; her voice, which holds no recognition; and the actual sensation that his entire past has lost its bearings in an instant.

He sits longer than necessary before standing up.

His body moves, but without any inner impulse, as if he isn’t initiating life, but simply agreeing to "endure" it further.

(Phew...)

The first few hours pass in a strange state of emotional numbness.

Sohen doesn’t feel the acute pain one usually expects in such situations.

Instead, there is a heaviness, smeared across his entire perception.

(The world looks... a little distant.)

Sounds are there, but seemingly without context; people are speaking, but the words don’t "stick."

...

On the second day, social distortion is added to this.

The people around him exist, but their presence doesn’t integrate into his inner state.

Runo and Phoebe are moving around, talking, getting ready to leave... and it all feels like events from another dimension.

He understands what’s going on, but... he doesn’t feel the weight of it.

Karin tries to help, even more than the others, but the young man’s mind and heart are elsewhere.

Sohen understands that soon his grandmother and sister will be leaving for a while, but all he can do is say a few words, because for some reason he can’t do more.

...

Day three becomes the most dangerous precisely because of the absence of intense emotions.

He speaks less, moves less, and reacts less, and... it doesn’t look like a choice.

- (Karin). "Sohen has... anhedonia."

- (Runo). "Sweetheart..."

- (Phoebe). "Big brother..."

- (Me). "..."

His adopted mother’s words were simple... depression.

His thoughts about his biological mother don’t disappear, but they change form.

They cease to be sporadic memories and become a constant background process.

It’s no longer "I think about her," but "it’s constantly running through my head."

That’s exactly why he becomes exhausted even without actively experiencing it.

During this period, the whole family tries to influence his state through behavioral stabilization: food, simple actions, structured requests directed at him, attempts to restore a minimal rhythm, but... this doesn’t produce a quick effect, because the problem isn’t in the external structure, but in the internal loss of meaningful anchors.

(So many scientific terms...)

...

A new morning begins.

He gets out of bed to drink some water and hears a strangely organized commotion.

Sohen goes into the kitchen and sees suitcases.

Runo stands by the table, checking something on his phone with the intense focus of someone who allows himself no emotional distractions.

Phoebe sits on the windowsill, appearing somewhat relaxed on the outside, but harboring the same inner tension that arises before journeys that mean more than they seem.

- (Me). "Have three days really passed so quickly?"

- (Runo). "Yes, my dear. We’re getting ready, and in a few minutes we’ll be heading to the nearest airport."

- (Phoebe). "..."

- (Me). "I see..."

- (Runo). "My sunshine, hang in there and don’t let your inner self ruin your future. We love you and will always support you. Don’t give in to your inner chaos and come back even stronger."

- (Phoebe). "Don’t lose yourself completely, and know that we’re worried about you more than you can imagine. Make a decision for yourself and move forward, my dearest older brother."

- (Me). "..."

(Strong words, my sweet and dear ones...)

- (Me). "Thank you... Grandma and Sister."

- (Runo). "You’re welcome, my dear. We’ll be back before you know it."

A few minutes later, they both left the house, leaving me alone with... my real mom, got into a taxi that arrived quickly, and drove to the airport.

- (Karin). "They’re gone, but they’ll be back soon. Don’t miss them, because you’ll have the funniest woman among all your acquaintances right here with you. Now let’s go inside — I’ve made your favorite pork steak using Grandma’s recipe."

- (Me). "Okay..."

...

The first few hours after they leave pass surprisingly smoothly.

He sits, then lies down, and after a while sits again.

My mind keeps going over the same loop: a mother who is there but doesn’t remember; a connection that exists but is still at a low level; and the feeling that my own role in this scenario has no external validation.

(Nostalgia... Kind of like how I felt during my early years, and when I was left alone after my father’s death... Phew... Who would have thought that a few hours of conversation with my biological mother would affect my psyche so much. Still, some things never change, right, Sohen?)

Karin’s cooking was top-notch, but unfortunately, it didn’t help.

Sohen continued to behave just as he had... for the past three days.

Throughout the day, Mom tried to improve my condition using traditional methods like conversation, music therapy, healthy eating, tidying up the space, massage, walks, and changing activities, but... to no avail.

Karin’s heart ached because she couldn’t truly help, and having run out of ideas, she let me be alone for a while.

A few more hours passed, and evening fell.

We started having dinner and chatting a bit.

Runo and Phoebe were already halfway to Tokyo.

They promised to call as soon as their feet touched Japanese soil.

Sohen listened to this, but without any particular emotion.

(Damn!... Why, of all times, just when two of the three most important women in my life are enjoying the chance to visit one of the hubs that sets the trends in technology, fashion, and gastronomy... does this bag of bones decide to fall into a depression after hearing the words of a woman he’s seeing for the first time in his life... Sometimes I hate myself just as much...)

After the conversation, everyone decided to go to their own rooms.

Sohen decided to watch a movie that... helped him realize something.

(Really... why did I react so strongly?... I created this psychological barrier myself, which has been holding me back these past three days... I need to let go of all this negativity and...)

(~sound of a knock on the door)

- (Me). "???"

Suddenly, someone knocked on Sohen’s door, pulling him out of his thoughts, and knocked gently.

- (Karin). "Honey, are you still awake? Can I come in?"

It wasn’t hard to guess that it was Karin.

- (Me). "Yes. Come in."

At that very moment, the phone, which had been lying there by accident, fell from his lap and landed directly on the floor.

- (Me). "Shit!..."

Staying in bed, he leaned forward to reach it, and just then Karin walked into the room.

- (Karin). "What happened, honey?"

- (Me). "My phone fell on the floor. I relaxed suddenly and forgot it was on my lap, so... it took a tumble. No big deal... Mom, wow?!"

When he reached for the phone and picked up, but, a scene unfolded before his eyes that he could never have expected.

- (Karin). "Is he okay?"

- (Me). "Yeah..."

- (Karin). "Hehe, I’m glad..."

- (Me). "..."

Karin slowly walked into the room and closed the door behind her.

- (Karin). "My dear... I need to discuss something with you."

- (Me). "..."

Standing before Sohen was his beloved and very close mother, but...

- (Karin). "What’s the matter, my dear? Hehe, you’re looking at me strangely..."

- (Me). "..."

Karin didn’t understand why Sohen was so surprised by her appearance... or at least she pretended not to, and also... she was wearing clothes that no mother should ever show her son.

(Damn it...)

The mature woman was wearing an erotic fishnet bodysuit that combined elements of a bodysuit, lingerie, and stockings into a single garment.

- (Karin). "Sohen♡..."