I'm in Senior Year, and the System Says I'm Going on a Blind Date with My Childhood Sweetheart

"Assassination? Shen Yuan, maybe you should brush up on the law. I’m performing a public service, ridding the world of a pest."

With that, Li Zhi took a step forward, leaned in, and whispered, "After all, when a certain someone was poking my hair last week, that was some classic Selaan behavior!"

Shen Yuan’s expression instantly soured. He stiffened his neck and, forcing a calm facade, retorted, "Th-that was the pen cap! It slipped on its own! What’s that got to do with me!"

However, Li Zhi clearly didn’t believe his explanation.

She raised an eyebrow, the tip of her ice cream stick slowly closing in on Shen Yuan’s face as if it would poke him at any second.

Just as the tension peaked, Shen Yuan had a sudden stroke of genius. He snapped his mouth open and bit down on the ice cream stick in Li Zhi’s hand.

Then, with a sharp jerk of his head, he forcefully yanked the ice cream stick right out of her hand.

"Hehehe! Now you don’t get any!" Shen Yuan cackled smugly, his obnoxious laughter filling the air.

Li Zhi was stunned by his sudden move. By the time she snapped out of it, Shen Yuan had already bolted, covering more than ten meters in the blink of an eye.

Li Zhi gave a helpless purse of her lips and pulled another unopened ice cream bar from her pocket.

While tearing open the wrapper, she watched his cheerfully retreating figure and couldn’t help but curse inwardly, ’Dumbass Shen Yuan!’

Eating her ice cream, Li Zhi headed for the classroom.

Under the shade of a tree at the corner, Shen Yuan, who had just been frolicking away, reappeared at Li Zhi’s side, the stolen ice cream stick dangling from his mouth.

Seeing the new ice cream bar in Li Zhi’s hand, Shen Yuan resolutely decided to use the stick he’d stolen for himself.

Even though his own ice cream cup already came with one.

...

Back in the classroom, before Shen Yuan could even reach his seat, his path was blocked by Ah Jie and a group of his cronies.

Under Li Zhi’s confused gaze, Shen Yuan was dragged away by Ah Jie.

"What the hell is your problem?" Shen Yuan shot Ah Jie an impatient look.

Ah Jie, however, had shed his usual goofy demeanor and was staring at Shen Yuan with a dead-serious expression.

"Fix your attitude!" Ah Jie barked. "I am now officially interrogating you on behalf of the Early Love Prohibition Association!"

"What?" Shen Yuan was baffled. "I’m not in your stupid association. What gives you the right to interrogate me?"

Faced with Shen Yuan’s non-compliance, Ah Jie gave a grand wave of his hand and yelled to the boys behind him, "Get him!"

Before the words were even out, the group behind Ah Jie pounced on Shen Yuan.

"My ice cream! My ice cream!"

Before Shen Yuan could react, they had him hoisted up.

After the world stopped spinning, Shen Yuan found himself held fast, facing the back door of the classroom.

Ah Jie stood before him, face grim, and began the interrogation. "First question! What, exactly, is your relationship with Li Zhi? Spit it out!"

"Childhood friends!" Shen Yuan snorted. "Jealous? Then come at me!"

"You...!" Ah Jie faltered.

"I...!" Ah Jie faltered again.

"Shit! Second question!"

Ah Jie’s expression hardened again. "Are you and Li Zhi dating?! Answer me!"

"Dating my ass!"

Shen Yuan yelled at Ah Jie, "She won’t date anyone who scores below a 650! So you can give up! All of you can give up! HAHAHAHA!!"

"ARGH!"

Shen Yuan let out a pained scream.

"Shit, sorry. Couldn’t help myself."

"Next time you’re gonna roast us like that, give us a heads-up so we can brace for it."

Shen Yuan raged at them, "This is vigilantism! Torturing me for a confession! No wonder your damn Early Love Prohibition Association is looked down on by the Kissing Association! You’re just the dean’s lackeys!"

"I’m in the Wild History Research Society! And you guys are just ’history’!"

"A stain on the history of Jiyang Middle School!"

But for the members of the Early Love Prohibition Association, who were long accustomed to scorn, this was nothing.

The path to upholding campus decency was destined to be a thankless one.

They believed that the path they walked would ultimately lead to a brighter future!

But just then, a voice piped up from the group administering the Aruba.

"Hehe, I think I scored a 650."

All eyes instantly snapped to the boy who had spoken.

With that, Ah Jie’s composure shattered. The rest of the Early Love Prohibition Association’s did, too.

"Not good! Someone’s been brainwashed by the Kissing Association!"

"That’s not it!"

Before the boy could even explain, he was hoisted up by the others.

Shen Yuan, meanwhile, was let go.

Shen Yuan had a strong suspicion that these assholes in the Early Love Prohibition Association were just using the club as a justifiable excuse to Aruba people.

Back in his seat, Shen Yuan flopped onto his desk, whimpering, and looked over at Li Zhi in the next aisle.

"You weren’t even going to come and save me?"

Young Master Li shook her head, focusing on her ice cream. "If I saved you, wouldn’t that just make it seem like there’s something special between us? Then those guys from the Early Love Prohibition Association would be even harder on you."

With that, Li Zhi gave Shen Yuan a wink. "I was protecting you."

’She had a point.’

But Shen Yuan’s gaze remained mournful. "Then, may I ask, what relationship do we have?"

"We’re classmates. We’re neighbors. In short, we have no relationship to speak of." Young Master Li’s answer was crisp and direct.

Shen Yuan’s gaze grew even more forlorn as he looked at Young Master Li. "Then why didn’t you save me?"

At his words, the corners of Young Master Li’s mouth lifted into a sweet smile. "If we have no relationship, then that’s all the more reason not to save you. What if people got the wrong idea?"

"What good does it do you to piss me off to death?"

Young Master Li blinked and replied with a perfectly straight face, "It prevents nodules."

’Shit, that reason was way too legitimate.’

Shen Yuan’s eyes rolled back in his head. He was so angry he could just die.

Nearby, Zhuo Peipei suddenly looked up. Her gaze landed on Shen Yuan, and she felt a thick wave of resentful energy emanating from him.

’This is no place to linger!’

Zhuo Peipei quickly grabbed her test papers, nudged the corpse-cosplaying Shen Yuan to briefly "resurrect" and make way, then slipped over to sit beside He Zhiyu.

Just then, Ah Jie’s voice echoed from the back of the classroom.

"We are without fault!" he declared, using the royal ’we’. "You bunch of weaklings! Your resolve shatters after just a few words! How can you possibly uphold our ideals?"

The moment the words left his mouth, they pounced on him.

"Screw you! You fed us a load of crap!"

"You’re the one who betrayed our ideals!"

"Next time, leave the ’childhood friends’ off the list!"

After a pained scream, Ah Jie’s voice rang out from the back row again.

"We are now a member of the Wild History Research Society! And you all are just ’history’!"

"Well, look at that! A traitor in our midst, is it!"

"Bring out the heavy torture!!"

The afternoons in Class 15 were truly a scene of vibrant, burgeoning life!

A moment later, Ah Jie was also draped over his desk, whimpering and groaning.

"Serves you right."

Facing Shen Yuan’s mournful gaze, Ah Jie snorted. "It’s called a noble sacrifice for a greater cause! What the hell would you know!"

Shen Yuan pointed at Ah Jie. "Fine, then I’ll just kill you some other day and grant you your wish."

Hearing this, Ah Jie perked up.

"Okay, but wait for me to write a speech first. If I’m going to die a martyr, it has to be a spectacular affair!"

"Speech my ass! I’ll assassinate you while you’re jerking off!"

Shen Yuan rattled off quickly, "Zhou Shaojie of Jiyang, born post-2000. Top-tier in science, decent in Chinese, trash at English. In the first semester of his senior year of high school, he suffered an accident while ’piloting his plane,’ resulting in catastrophic failure and the death of the pilot. His lifelong reputation, ruined in an instant, serving only as a cautionary tale and a good laugh."

"I’ve even written your epitaph. Now die!"

With that, Shen Yuan pounced on Zhou Shaojie.

At that moment, Zhuo Peipei, now sitting with He Zhiyu, looked at her two former deskmates, then glanced back at Li Zhi.

"Aren’t you going to talk some sense into them?"

Li Zhi shook her head, her tone firm. "They deserve it."

Zhuo Peipei’s eyes immediately lit up, a feeling of ’great minds think alike’ swelling in her chest.

"The Early Love Prohibition Association really does deserve to die!"

Li Zhi glanced at Zhuo Peipei.

Li Zhi wasn’t unaware of the conflict between the Early Love Prohibition Association and the Kissing Association.

Young Master Li had never paid it much attention, but from the looks of it now, they were practically mortal enemies.

’But they really do deserve it.’

’The Early Love Prohibition Association deserves to die.’

Li Zhi watched Shen Yuan pin Zhou Shaojie to the desk and silently cheered, ’Go for it!’

"You son of a bitch, if you don’t pay me back for my ice cream today, I’m going to kill you!"

"Apple you! Fine, we can fight, but at least let me breathe!"