Love Before Graduation

My mind had stopped working, so I stepped out into the corridor to give myself some fresh air. The corridor wasn't spinning. I was.

Maybe I was losing it.

Maybe I was just... alive.

I was breathing, sure—but it felt like I'd borrowed someone else's lungs.

My fists weren't at my sides, they were buried somewhere inside me.

The door shut behind me like someone had carved a verdict onto my back—

"Nothing will be the same now."

I didn't know where I was going.

Maybe nowhere.

Maybe exactly where no one goes—inside myself.

Then a voice grabbed me.

"Aira!"

It was Nami.

Like the last thread of something real.

Like a hand you catch while drowning.

She grabbed my wrist.

No—she dragged me.

Away from stares, whispers,

Away from the place where 'rumor' becomes a girl's first name.

We ended up in a deserted hallway.

The sun's light was scattered on the dust like it was mocking me.

I was shattered,

and she wasn't.

"Stop it, Aira! He's gone!"

Her voice ripped through the silence like a slap in the face.

I burst.

"He's not!"

I didn't yell—I exploded.

"He comes in my dreams...

Tells me I could've saved him...

That I let him die."

I was trembling.

Not bones—

Regret was trembling.

In my sobs was everything I'd never told anyone.

Nami pulled me into her arms.

Warm.

Real.

Alive.

"Please... stop,"

she whispered into my hair,

her voice not just reaching my ears,

but my soul.

"I'm here. I'm not going anywhere."

I clung to her shirt like it was the last thing keeping me in this world.

"I'm sorry..."

I murmured,

like I wasn't confessing a mistake, but surrendering.

She pulled back just a little, looked into my eyes

—as if she was reading something she already knew.

"I know," she said.

And in that moment—

what was left after everything broke—was understanding.

Nami wasn't just Nami.

She was mine.

She was the voice in the dark I couldn't hear myself in.

And that moment gave me a truth too sharp to ignore—

If I ever lost this girl...

I'd lose myself too.

"Let's go home," she said.

Like home wasn't a place, but a kind of peace.

She held my hand like she knew that was the only thing keeping me from shattering.

Back in class, she picked up my bag like it was the most normal thing.

Like I wasn't a burden,

but a responsibility.

She walked with me to the gate.

To the bus.

To the edge of breath.

"Get some rest. Don't think too much."

Think?

I didn't smile.

But my eyes whispered—

"You're all I've got."

I sat on the bus.

Didn't care about the destination.

Just the silence.

Got home.

Mom didn't ask anything.

Just ran her hand over my hair.

Like forgiveness.

And as I reach my room , I slept.

No dreams.

No voices.

No shadows of guilt creeping through my skull.

Just sleep.

Warm.

Still.

Safe.

When I woke up, the room was bathed in dusk light,

and where pain used to be in my chest—there was something else.

Calm.

Maybe Arin was right.

Maybe it was all in my head.

Just a ghost that grief gave birth to.

Not a real one.

I got up.

Whispered to myself—

"I'm okay.

I think... I'm okay."

I walked out toward the living room.

Mom was setting the table.

"I'm going for a walk," I told her, grabbing my keys from the hook.

She nodded with a soft smile.

And I stepped out into the cool evening air.

I thought—ice cream would be good.

Something sweet to melt the weight in my head.

But halfway there, my scooter died.

The fuel gauge blinked red—angry and empty.

I pulled into a gas station, handed over the key, and took a deep breath.

While the attendant filled the tank, I leaned back, glancing around.

Everything glowed gold under the setting sun.

And then I saw—Arin.

But he wasn't alone.

A girl was with him.

Beautiful.

Laughing.

Her laughter glistened in the sunlight.

And Arin... he smiled.

My heart shrank.

Tight.

Like someone had clenched it in their fist.

She hugged him.

He hugged back.

Like it was routine.

Like it belonged to them.

They moved toward his bike.

She held onto his waist—tight—like she was home.

I looked away.

Before the tears came.

Maybe she's just his friend, I told myself.

But my chest...

that knot didn't loosen.

Not even a little.