Idol Hides His Military Service

"Shinyu, go wake Lee Sion."

"Yes, got it!"

It was about time to head out for the company.

Seo Ryujin, who was already finished getting ready, gave Shinyu a special mission: go wake Lee Sion, who was still sleeping.

Click.

When Shinyu opened the door and stepped into Lee Sion’s room, the view of the dorm’s big shared room came into sight—something Shinyu had gotten used to by now, but that had been incomprehensible beyond belief the first time.

‘There are more figures!’

The big room Lee Sion, Lee Gahyeon, and Kurosawa Yuri shared.

Because three of them used it, the biggest room in the dorm was split into three exact sections, each one reflecting its owner’s tastes as-is.

First, in Lee Gahyeon’s area—despite her looks—she liked cute, dainty things, so it was decorated with pretty little knickknacks and dolls she’d bought whenever she had a spare moment, wandering around the streets.

On the other hand—

— Japanese people originally like practical stuff!

— Isn’t that just because she’s lazy?

— That’s racist!

Kurosawa Yuri, who looked like she’d fall asleep hugging a doll, was so minimal that she barely had any personal belongings beyond basic daily necessities.

She claimed it was the latest trendy Scandinavian style, but—

‘Yuri is the type who never buys useless things.’

To Shinyu, it looked like Yuri’s personality was reflected exactly—a surprisingly cool, strict side where she didn’t bother buying anything she didn’t need.

Last, when Shinyu turned her gaze to check Lee Sion’s territory—

— We swore to become brothers under the peach tree~♬

A booming, grand Chinese song blared from the laptop sitting on top of the bed.

And on the desk beside that bed, a dazzling array of figures.

Shinyu clearly remembered that before, there had only been one big figure of Liu Bei, Guan Yu, and Zhang Fei standing with their weapons raised, but at some point, a figure of Zhuge Liang, holding a fan and standing lofty and proud, had been added next to it.

‘How is she sleeping?’

In this disastrous scene that was hard to believe belonged to an idol’s room, Lee Sion was asleep on the bed with her mouth open like it was nothing, and Shinyu couldn’t help admiring her.

— Does sleeping take effort?

Lee Sion always slept with Shinyu as a pillow during car rides, so Shinyu already knew she slept well, but it was still amazing that she didn’t wake up even with this loud, noisy music pouring out of the laptop.

Slip.

Shinyu pulled out her phone and checked the time. It was 11 a.m.

‘Then what’s the point of waking up early?’

Lee Sion—currently soaking her pillow with drool—was actually the member who woke up the earliest.

— Another fine morning.

No matter what time she’d fallen asleep the night before, the moment it hit 6 a.m., Lee Sion got up, came out to the living room, and did loud, showy calisthenics. That was her routine.

And if she had a bit of extra time, she’d go run around the apartment complex, and because of that, an unspoken rule formed in the dorm.

— Never wake up early!

After waking up early a few times and getting grabbed by Lee Sion and dragged into running with her in a disaster, the members no longer came out to the living room even if their eyes were already open.

— Tsk tsk, hoo-hoo! If you control your breathing, you can sing while you run!

— Why do we have to run this hard?

— Because... it’s fun? If you just run, it’s boring.

Even Geum Shinyu—who normally wouldn’t hesitate to hug a bomb and jump into a fire pit if it was something Lee Sion wanted—refused to join Lee Sion’s dawn running after participating once and suffering aftereffects for two days.

But that Lee Sion, who spent her mornings so noisily—

— If she’s going to do that, why even wake up early?!

After she finished running, she’d come back, shower, and if she didn’t have a schedule, she’d immediately go back to sleep. A weird routine.

Whenever the members saw Lee Sion like that, they couldn’t help thinking she should just sleep in properly if she was going to do that anyway.

Anyway, waking Lee Sion up after she’d fallen back asleep like this wasn’t easy.

The best method was tempting her with food.

- Sniff sniff.

Even if she was asleep, if she smelled something like ramen or chicken, Lee Sion would wake up like a ghost.

‘There isn’t any food right now.’

But if there was no food, no matter how much you tried to wake her, Lee Sion would just shout ‘five more minutes’ and extend five minutes into an hour, turning into the kind of karaoke freeloader everyone hates.

So the members had mastered how to handle Lee Sion a long time ago.

"Liu Bei is a loser of history."

Flinch.

Shinyu only whispered it by her ear, but even half-asleep, Lee Sion’s body immediately twitched.

Her expression turned vicious like she’d just had a terrifying nightmare, but she still didn’t look like she was going to get up.

‘Do I have to use stage two today?’

Normally, if you insulted one of Liu Bei, Guan Yu, or Zhang Fei, Lee Sion would wake up, but sometimes there were days when even that didn’t work.

In that case—

"Honestly, Messi is better at soccer than Ronaldo."

"What, you vomit squad bastard!"

"Are you awake, Sion?"

"What—Shinyu?"

"Sion, it’s time to go to the company."

"Ugh! It’s already that time?"

The moment Shinyu brought up Ronaldo and Messi, it was like Lee Sion had never been asleep—she shot upright and made a savage face.

Then she realized it was Shinyu in front of her, immediately relaxed, yawned lazily, and stretched.

‘Thank god I didn’t have to go to stage three.’

Shinyu watched Lee Sion shake off the sleepiness and slither out of bed like a snake, thinking how lucky it was she didn’t have to go to stage three, because—

— Seiker is honestly just getting carried by his teammates!

Most of the time, Lee Sion woke up if you used stage two, but when she was truly exhausted, there were times she didn’t get up even if you used the magic word Ronaldo.

Then there was no choice but to run the stage-three protocol for waking Lee Sion up, and the problem was that stage three posed massive danger to the caster.

— Kyaaaah!! Save the foreign worker!

— You’re dead today.

Once, when Yuri had been the one assigned to wake Lee Sion and provoked her using Seiker, Lee Sion—still half-asleep—had grabbed Yuri by the back of the neck and radiated killing intent.

If Lee Gahyeon hadn’t rushed to stop her, there was a high chance Yuri would’ve gotten an injury bad enough to stop activities.

Since then, the members had promised not to use stage three unless it was a truly urgent situation, so Shinyu was relieved that today ended at stage two.

Lee Sion was unusually lenient with Shinyu compared to the other members, but when stage three got used, she acted unconsciously, so even for Shinyu, there was no guarantee of safety.

After all those twists and turns, Shinyu completed the mission of waking Lee Sion up.

"I’m done getting ready!"

"You’re already done?"

"What, today makeup is useless anyway, and the outfit’s already decided, right?"

"That’s true."

"Then let’s just go like this."

Lee Sion—who had done a rough cat-wash and thrown on sweatpants—declared she was ready, hooked an arm over Shinyu’s shoulder, hummed, and urged her to hurry up and go out.

***

"Sion, do you want my pork cutlet too?"

"Huh? No... I’m really fine."

"I saw the broadcast—don’t you like pork cutlets?"

"...I’m really fine."

Holding her pork cutlet, Gahyeon felt self-loathing as she looked at the female officer candidate—still looking fresh and green—asking if Gahyeon was really sure she didn’t want more.

‘You insane Lee Gahyeon! You almost took it!’

Lunch.

If you had to classify her, Gahyeon wasn’t the type who ate a lot.

— Buuuurp.

— Lee Sion, stop burping so grossly!

— But I can’t help what comes out!

Compared to Lee Sion, who demolished every meal like the world was ending tomorrow, Gahyeon’s appetite was closer to small.

‘It’s just that I’m the type who gains weight easily.’

If Lee Sion had the bizarre constitution where she didn’t gain weight no matter what she ate, then Gahyeon was the opposite—a miraculous constitution where she gained weight exactly as much as she ate—no, twice as much.

Anyway, Gahyeon, who couldn’t be called a big eater, was now facing the dilemma of her life.

‘I’m hungry!’

The moment the Three Kingdoms stage ended, she and Raon had gotten grabbed and dragged away by the Paldo Man filming crew, to Goesan’s student military officer school.

— Drop your bags, change into combat fatigues, and assemble again in ten minutes!

The moment they arrived at what people called the ROTC school, Gahyeon had to roll around with Raon and female officer candidates she’d never seen before.

‘Who knew the Marine camp would help.’

It was frustrating that the Marine camp they’d experienced earlier in the in-house content helped her here, but thanks to that experience, Gahyeon adapted quickly.

— Candidate Raon, did you come here to play?

— Ah... no!

— Do you know how many candidates’ time—and instructors’ time—was wasted because of you alone? If you know that, can you really move that slowly?

— I’m sorry!

Unlike Raon—who hadn’t changed fast enough and ended up in a brutal exchange with an instructor wearing sunglasses—and the other celebrity participants who got punished, Gahyeon alone changed on time and even earned the title of “ace” among the participants.

After that, Gahyeon and Raon were training together with the other dragged-in female celebrities, receiving the same training as the officer candidates.

— From now on, we will perform the Armed Forces calisthenics. Armed Forces calisthenics will be performed twice, from Exercise No. 1 Leg Movement to Exercise No. 12 Breathing Movement, in time with the broadcast accompaniment. Starting with Exercise No. 1 Leg Movement—begin!

After various mental-discipline lectures and cleaning the barracks, the first day ended in the blink of an eye. And now, on the second day, before they’d even properly woken up, they were dragged out at the crack of dawn to do the Armed Forces calisthenics.

— Isn’t this what Lee Sion does every morning?!

While Raon and the other participants fumbled because they didn’t know what to do, Gahyeon could more or less follow along.

Because Armed Forces calisthenics was that unknown exercise Lee Sion did every dawn.

How shocked had Gahyeon been when she realized the mystery exercise Lee Sion did at dawn was Armed Forces calisthenics?

Of course, she didn’t have time to think deeply about it because of the 3-kilometer run that followed.

After they staggered through the run too, and finished, after a short break, another hardship came crashing down.

— Aaaah! My shoulder!

— PD, are you okay?!

— Where is there any PD here?!

— Candidate Raon, are you okay?!

A full pack pushing twenty kilograms.

The candidates got the special order to wear it and move to the training field where the training was scheduled.

On top of that, they were holding their issued rifles too, so even just standing still made it feel like their shoulders would pop out, and when they heard they had to walk about an hour to the field, Raon and Gahyeon seriously considered desertion.

— This is Ggeoltteok Hill.

— Ggeoltteok Hill?

— Think about this: on the way back, you’ll have to walk up it.

— ...

— Doesn’t it already feel like you’re ggeoltteok-breathing?

The path to the training field—an angle that looked terrifying even at a glance.

At least it was downhill on the way there, but when Gahyeon realized they’d have to come back up it, her vision started spinning.

— If we fall here...

— Get it together, PD! We said we’d go back and get revenge on the CEO and Lee Sion!

— I will... definitely get revenge. When we get back, Gahyeon, you stay out of it.

Climbing that path that even the officer candidates training there struggled with, Gahyeon and Raon could feel a deep bond forming between them.

Whenever they talked about revenge on Lee Sion—who was probably lying on the sofa at the dorm right now, drinking cola and watching TV—or CEO Kim Sanghyeok, who was probably sitting in the CEO office as usual with a blank expression doing work, flames shot up in their chests.

Was this the comradeship people who went to the army talked about?

— Everyone, take off your masks and sing the military song!

— High mountain, deep valley, silent land! On the snow-covered front we gooo—!

Thanks to that, after finishing the NBC training that morning, Raon and Gahyeon safely returned to the barracks.

Considering that one of the celebrity participants—a comedienne—had collapsed and gotten loaded into the ambulance following them, it was definitely an enormous achievement.

After that, they got a brief rest, then lunch.

Compared to the pitiful breakfast that had been nothing but anchovies, kimchi, and tofu, lunch served a special meal: pork cutlet.

Raon and Gahyeon tore into it like crazy.

"I can’t believe I can eat this much."

"It’s my first time eating this mindlessly too."

It was so much that even the officer candidates sharing their barracks tried to give them side dishes while watching them eat.

‘So the thing people say about being hungry in the military was true.’

Gahyeon realized her cousin’s older brother hadn’t been lying when he said in basic training, you got hungry even if you just breathed.

"Do you remember what we’re doing this afternoon?"

As they finished eating and returned to the barracks in formation, one participant asked, and a candidate with them answered immediately.

"This afternoon, we have shooting scheduled."

"Shooting as in firing a gun?"

"Thank god. That sounds kind of easy."

"Right. This morning’s NBC training was so hard. Just thinking about our faces with tears and snot on camera already scares me."

Hearing it was shooting training, the participants’ tension loosened, and remembering their duty as variety entertainers, they started talking.

But—

"Do you not know PRI?"

"What?"

"Shooting training isn’t mainly about firing the gun. PRI is the real thing."

At the candidate’s words, they went speechless again.

***

"Am I going to die like this?"

"Hang in there, PD! How did we walk back here and then—!"

"Ugh... I’m so scared that we have to go back!"

Raon was happy—and terrified—that at 1 p.m., under the blazing sun, they’d walked for a full hour to finally reach the shooting range.

It had been a long time since the sky looked yellow to Raon.

Back when she was promoting in Japan, there was a time she’d spent twenty out of twenty-four hours studying Japanese and doing vocal and dance practice, and she’d once seen the sky turn yellow while dancing.

Now Raon felt so exhausted it made her think of that time.

— I told you. Even PD Raon is old now.

As annoying as it was, the thought that Lee Sion might have been right made Raon suddenly feel sad.

But—

"Candidates, ➤ NоvеⅠight ➤ (Read more on our source) in four columns, scatter and assemble!"

"Scatter and assemble!"

There was no time to get lost in those thoughts.

After lunch, the afternoon schedule started immediately, and they’d had to put the pack and rifle back on, cross the rough ridge again, and reach the field without getting any real rest.

And now, at the instructor’s order calling the candidates together, Raon had to force her body up again.

Creak.

The sound of joints grinding from Raon’s body.

"..."

"No!"

"Raon, aren’t you overdoing it?"

"Please don’t look at me like that!"

Raon wanted to explain that this sound wasn’t because she was old, but a side effect from dancing since she was young, but with everyone looking at her with pity, she had no choice but to shut her mouth.

Even the instructor who’d gathered them showed concern beyond the sunglasses, so Raon clenched her teeth and headed for the formation.

"Was it hard moving to the field today?"

"No, sir!"

The instructor knew it was hard too.

"So for you, I’ve specially prepared a bus for the return trip."

Flash.

Once the candidates lined up and the instructor started speaking before training, everyone’s eyes lit up.

But—

"However, you can’t just ride the bus. Candidate Lee Sion, step out."

The moment the instructor finished speaking, Raon saw someone approaching from far away.

"Lee Sion?"

Raon’s nemesis.

Raon’s enemy.

Raon’s bad blood.

KJ Entertainment’s disaster, a living, moving anomaly.

Lee Sion was walking over in combat fatigues.