Idol Hides His Military Service

"Wouldn’t it have been better if PD Raon went on the variety show with them?"

Sanghyeok, the CEO of KJ Entertainment, voiced his regret as he looked down at the schedule in his hand.

The schedule Sanghyeok had been peering at for a while now, packed tight with appointments, was none other than the schedule for Iam, KJ Entertainment’s only artist.

A pretty full schedule for Iam, with a lineup that started with fairly famous variety programs and ran through music shows and even advertisements.

Sanghyeok knew this was an excellent schedule for a group that had just debuted, but deep down, he also felt some regret.

There were variety shows they couldn’t go on because the timing didn’t work out, and there were also a few variety shows that had been gaining popularity lately that had reached out, but they couldn’t go on because of conditions.

For example, conditions like asking about a member’s sensitive private life, or,

"It wouldn’t be good for me to go on a variety show with you."

Conditions like demanding that their producer, Raon, appear as a companion guest.

"If PD Raon says so, then that judgment is probably right."

"Huh?"

Raon reacted like she was the one surprised at Sanghyeok’s refreshingly quick answer.

But even at Raon’s reaction, Sanghyeok didn’t really mind.

'She’s probably worried the attention will get split.'

Sanghyeok could roughly guess what Raon was considering when Raon tried not to go on variety shows with Iam.

-If Raon-nim appears with them too, we’ll try to lock down a slot as quickly as possible.

Up until Iam’s debut, KJ Entertainment had even held back on variety appearances that had piled in on purpose, adjusting things so all the buzz would be poured fully into the album.

But now the debut was done, so it was time to start variety activities in earnest and actively push the group’s name recognition and promote the album.

However, in that process, a few programs they wanted to appear on weren’t asking for Iam alone, but were demanding that their producer, Raon, appear with them.

"Considering the status PD Raon built up in Korea and Japan, if you appear with Iam, the attention is bound to go to you, PD Raon."

"Uh···When you put it like that, it’s kind of embarrassing?"

"It’s the truth."

Raon.

She hadn’t declared retirement, but it had been three years already since she’d effectively retired, and yet her status hadn’t faded. She was a top star in name and reality.

She was unrivaled among female solo singers, and a singer who didn’t lack for the expression ‘the first Korean singer to break into Japan,’ so it wasn’t strange that broadcast stations wanted her.

Honestly, Sanghyeok had only gotten used to seeing Raon every day while doing company work, but when he first found out she was KJ Entertainment’s producer, he had been shocked beyond words.

'Didn’t her last over-the-air variety show appearance hit number one in ratings for that time slot?'

Especially since Raon hadn’t even done a lot of variety activity, just showing up was basically a guarantee of buzz.

If Raon appeared together with them, it was certain that every variety program that existed would push everything else back and cast Iam and Raon.

Raon was that kind of superstar.

And that was also why Raon wasn’t going on variety shows together with Iam.

If she went with them, she could definitely get Iam onto more variety shows, and onto higher-buzz ones too, but on the flip side, there was a chance Iam would become the side dish.

'Honestly, the kids probably wouldn’t become side dishes just because they go out with me.'

Of course, when Raon thought about what the Iam members had shown so far, Raon thought she might be the one who got eaten instead. But just in case, she thought it was still too early to appear together.

Raon thought it would be better to do joint appearances only after the members’ recognition had settled in firmly.

"Iam is on track. So maybe I’m the one getting a little impatient."

"This timing is definitely extremely important."

Raon agreed with Sanghyeok.

Even though Sanghyeok knew that if Raon and Iam appeared together on variety shows, they could end up getting branded as supporting cast no matter how much immediate buzz they got, there was only one reason Sanghyeok still considered it.

[Digital chart: ‘Feels Like Something’s About to Start’ hits number 5!]

[Music video surpasses 5 million views, green light for 10 million]

[Iam vs. LYNX—who will be the winner of their head-to-head?]

Just like Raon had planned, focusing all of Iam’s buzz onto the debut stage had clearly been effective.

"I really felt it this time, firsthand, that music shows aren’t an activity you can judge by ratings."

"There’s a reason singers aren’t just filming them with their own money for nothing."

The reality of music shows was that not only did you not get paid, but after performing once, you’d blow at least a few hundred, and at most even a few thousand.

And yet, music shows were still the thing idols {N•o•v•e•l•i•g•h•t} were desperate to appear on.

And surprisingly, after Iam started appearing on music shows, the steady upward curve they’d had so far was showing a tremendous rise, like getting on a roller coaster.

So Sanghyeok wanted to give wings to that momentum, and he wanted to put them on any variety show that could do that.

They already had high name recognition among younger people, but spreading that across all age groups was, in the end, a role variety shows played.

"But···can the Iam members do well on variety?"

"Huh?"

"Of course they showed good variety sense on Agbaek and on their YouTube self-content, but most of that was filmed with just the members together, so it’s different from real variety shows, isn’t it?"

"Ah···."

Raon thought Sanghyeok’s doubt was originally valid.

Because there were plenty of idol types who were hilarious among themselves, but the moment they stood in front of strangers, they turned into total mutes.

But,

"That’s not what we should be worried about."

"Huh?"

Raon shook her head at Sanghyeok.

Suddenly, Raon remembered the prerecording interview from a few days ago.

Before variety filming, it was standard for the program’s writers to do a prior interview to investigate things like the guest’s background and episodes.

So the Iam members, who were about to film the popular variety show "The Guy Next Door" today, had also done a prior interview.

Raon had sat in on it to block anything sensitive or malicious, just in case.

And Raon realized something.

"We need to start by worrying about cleaning up after the kids cause an incident."

That on variety shows, the Iam members were already something even Raon herself couldn’t handle.

***

'To think the day would come when I see Masan Whitebeard in real life!'

Before filming, I was sitting at a desk in the classroom set, sneaking sideways glances at Kang Hobong, the main MC of The Guy Next Door, as he ran his eyes over the script with a strict, dignified, serious expression.

When I went to the waiting room to say hello, the first time I saw Kang Hobong, the main MC of The Guy Next Door, his presence was definitely different.

Starting with the overwhelming visual where you couldn’t even feel the gap between his neck and face, and even the physicality that made you doubt whether that build could really belong to someone past fifty and heading toward sixty.

Since it was my first time seeing Kang Hobong in person, it was just plain fascinating.

-Hobong tears people apart.

I remembered how a comedian who was famous for getting criticized would get especially intimidated whenever he talked about Kang Hobong.

Now that I saw him in real life, I could tell that story hadn’t been an exaggeration.

'Hmm···this won’t be easy.'

I imagined a one-on-one fight to the death with Kang Hobong on a deserted island over food, and I couldn’t easily picture myself winning.

With striking, it would be hard to overcome the physical difference, and trying to drag it to the ground would be suicide.

So to win, it would have to be outboxing, hit-and-run style···.

"Boss, are you nervous?"

"Huh?"

"What have you been thinking about so hard? Filming starts soon."

Ah.

While I was figuring out how to beat Kang Hobong in a head-to-head, it seemed we were already right before filming started.

Normally, before the main shoot, I would’ve had to review the script the staff handed out one more time, but,

'No matter how many times I look, it’s still crazy.'

A celebrity who used to be a pro basketball player and was over 2 meters tall, the vocalist of a band that used to be basically my idol, and even senior idols.

Seeing people I’d only seen on TV in real life was so fascinating, it was hard to stop watching.

"Alright, Iam members, please move to the waiting spot now. We’ll start filming soon!"

After I watched for a long time, a staff member said it was time to start, and told me and the members to move to the waiting place they’d informed us about in advance.

"Hoo···Hi! We’re transfer students who were selected by the nation’s vote and came to Voted-High···."

I moved to the waiting spot as the staff guided us, and I checked the other members’ condition, and it was surprising that none of them looked that nervous except Seo Ryujin.

"Ryujin, my ears are going to bleed. Stop muttering already!"

"Gahyeon! What if I mess up!"

"Then we reshoot. What, are you going to die?"

"I have to do it perfectly!"

All she’d been given was a single line to greet as the team representative, and yet Lee Gahyeon was telling Seo Ryujin to please hold back while Seo Ryujin was so tense she didn’t know what to do.

'That’s a huge leap forward.'

Not just Lee Gahyeon—seeing the other members acting like usual too, I couldn’t help thinking they’d grown.

Back when we filmed Agbaek, they’d freeze up the moment a camera was pointed at them.

-Your first variety show is set as "The Guy Next Door"!

Right now, we were about to film our first variety show.

Strictly speaking, it was hard to call it our first variety show, since we’d filmed Idol Ground 100, and the reality show Iam Story, and even the self-content that went up on YouTube.

'But those weren’t really “real variety,” either.'

Most of it was filmed with just our members, so it was hard to call it a formal variety show.

And the program we were filming for the first time, The Guy Next Door, was one of the most popular variety shows lately, and since famous celebrities were regular guests, it was a very important schedule.

If we were normal rookies, the normal thing would’ve been to shake like Seo Ryujin right now, trembling with the tension of having to do well.

But,

"PD Raon banned all of Yuri’s finishing moves!"

"Those aren’t finishing moves, those are self-destruct moves."

"Huh? Why? Yuri worked so hard preparing the Kang Hobong assassination voice impression!"

"It’s not a “description,” it’s an “impression.” Please, let’s not drag variety into an international dispute."

"Got it! So Yuri prepared a new finishing move!"

Starting with Yuri and Ryu Ayeon, who were chatting like the waiting spot was the dorm like always, Yunkyung was complaining like usual that she’d styled herself too cute, and Shinyu was stuck right to my side saying she was only going to trust you today, Sion. 𝐟𝕣𝗲𝕖𝕨𝗲𝐛𝗻𝗼𝐯𝗲𝚕.𝗰𝚘𝐦

There wasn’t a trace of tension in our members.

'I’m only a little worried about Seo No-Fun.'

Of course, I was a bit worried about Seo Ryujin.

If Seo Ryujin put everyone into a sleep state again like last time, I was wondering whether I’d have to step in again, or whether I should endure it.

Normally, I would’ve cut her off without mercy and saved the mood, but,

[Why isn’t our Ryujin growing up?]

"They say all the other members turned into Lee Sion and managed to be funny somehow, so why is it that the more our Ryujin tries to be funny, the more miserable it gets!"

↳There are still fans who expect “fun” from Seo Ryujin?

↳Give up. If you give up, you’ll be comfortable.

↳Mute it and just watch her face and it’s honestly peak comedy content

↳If even Seo Ryujin started going wild, Iam wouldn’t be a girl group, they’d be a circus troupe, so this is better!

↳We should’ve realized it back when she lectured idol history on the Agbaek live. Seo Ryujin is Lee Sion-class in a different way

Maybe the Seo Jigglypuff disaster at the showcase had shocked her more than I thought. Recently, Seo Ryujin was pure horror, learning weird jokes somewhere and doing them.

Where was she even finding jokes that would make even our quartermaster in a past life hate them? I started wondering if she’d discovered some kind of utopia that collected only jokes like that.

And more than that,

-Today, let me sleep here···.

-Okay···.

When I got the shocking report that Seo Ryujin did those jokes all night to her roommate, Ryu Ayeon, I’d actually felt relieved that I wasn’t in the same room as Seo Ryujin.

The most pitiful ones were Kim Yunsik and Park Jiu.

-Do you know what it is if you call “cherry” like this?

-No, I don’t know···.

-Cherry blossom! Cherry, blur, some! Isn’t this so clever?

-Wow, this is really funny! But it’s such high-level comedy that it might be hard for other people to understand, so let’s keep it between us.

-Really? Hmm···then I should prepare something else.

-A···something else?

Seeing the two of them having to nod along to Seo Ryujin’s comedy hell because of a manager’s duty, I thought, so this is what workplace bullying really is.

Anyway, Seo Ryujin had this tendency to solve everything with effort, but I never expected her to try to force comedy through effort too, and I felt so guilty I could hate myself.

I couldn’t help worrying that cutting off Seo Ryujin’s comment at the showcase had given her too big of a shock.

"It looks like it started!"

While I was thinking about whether I should seal Seo Ryujin today on variety, or trust the power of editing and give her one chance, it seemed filming had already started.

♬

A familiar song played through the set.

It was the intro of Spotlight, the theme song of Idol Ground 100.

"I’m the one, this moment right now!"

And in time with it, I heard Kang Hobong singing along to Spotlight’s lyrics.

"Man, someone must’ve shown Hobong something again, saying it’s trendy these days."

"Does he even know what song he just sang?"

"Hey! You guys don’t know Spartlight? This is insanely trendy among young people these days!"

"Sir, it’s not Spartlight, it’s Spotlight."

"And that stopped trending ages ago. And he’s only singing it now. That guy."

Hearing the The Guy Next Door cast tearing into Kang Hobong in unison like they’d practiced it, I thought, wow, it’s exactly like the broadcast, and a laugh slipped out of me without realizing.

"Please enter now!"

After I listened to the cast banter for a moment, a staff member wearing a headset signaled for us to enter.

"Let’s go!"

When the main shoot was about to start for real, the members finally looked a little tense, so I clenched my fist and spoke.

Tap.

Even without me saying anything else, the members brought their hands up to my fist.

Then we walked down the hallway and waited for a moment in front of the classroom door that was the filming set.

"Huh, wait—feels like someone’s here."

And maybe because they’d confirmed we arrived, one of the cast members stopped talking and tossed out that line, and in an instant the set went quiet and I could feel the attention focusing.

Rattle.

The familiar sound of a classroom door opening.

The moment the door opened, I stepped into the set, tightened my stomach, and shouted,

"Newbies, sound off!"

It was the start of Iam’s first variety show.