Surviving as a Maid of the Sichuan Tang Clan

My body, soaked in cold sweat, trembled uncontrollably. My vision went black, like someone was crushing my throat. I clawed at my neck as I gasped, but I couldn’t breathe.

“Little one, breathe. Hey—breathe.”

Tang Juhee, panicking, patted my back and tried to coax the retching out of me. I gagged and scraped at the floor.

The lingering trace of that foul anesthesia incense. A faint stench of blood drifting in the air. Gyeonga’s thin breathing, so fragile it felt like it could snap any second.

Everything around me hit with a sensitivity that wasn’t even comparable to normal. Goosebumps crawled over my skin.

“Young Lady, are you all right? Young Lady!”

“Hey—stop calling her Young Lady and bring a cold towel. Now.”

Songji’s frantic footsteps came close, then faded, then came close again. Maybe my fever had spiked again—my vision swam.

It took more than half an hour before the retching stopped and I could calm down. Curled up on the empty bed, I blinked slowly.

Even when I’d passed out under Tang Jung’s internal energy, even when I’d fallen off that cliff, I’d only been startled for a moment. I’d shaken it off quickly.

Because somewhere deep down, I’d believed I’d be fine.

But this time was different.

I’m scared.

My hands and feet wouldn’t stop shaking. I wanted to run—right now—run away from this place.

“Little one. Feeling steadier? Drink this. Why are you so softhearted?”

Tang Juhee shoved a teacup toward me, grumbling as if she’d brewed it herself.

“I’ve never seen a kid flip her eyes back like that just from seeing a little blood. Even Seho, scared as he is, doesn’t do this. This is why Ancestor Jonghyeon told everyone to keep their mouths shut.”

“Grandfather told you to keep your mouths shut? About what?”

“You said there were brats who used to bully you when you were a maid, right? I heard Ancestor Jonghyeon rounded them all up, killed them, and burned them.”

“...What?”

The words jammed in my throat.

So the reason Simyang’s group disappeared... was because they were dead?

“He told us to zip it because you’d faint if you found out. I wasn’t supposed to say anything. What I just told you is a secret, got it?”

Tang Juhee awkwardly covered it up, wiping the damp off her hands. My lips trembled. I looked at Songji.

“Songji. You knew too?”

“......”

Instead of answering, Songji bowed her head low. She avoided my eyes, twisting her sleeves in her fists, and a sigh slipped out of me on its own.

I knew it with my head. It was for me—to erase future trouble.

Tang Jung wasn’t the kind of man to spare someone who’d put a blade to the throat of the disciple he doted on.

That was the rule of this world.

But understanding it in your head and accepting it in your chest were different things.

Even if I’d spent half a year after crossing into the martial world, my common sense was still rooted in modern society.

I wasn’t brave enough to brush off—like it was nothing—the cruelty of cutting out someone’s tongue, swapping people out like machine parts, killing someone just because they were in the way.

When I fell silent, Songji sniffled and whispered.

“Please don’t hold it in your heart, Young Lady. The elder made an example of Simyang, so this won’t happen again. Who would dare touch you when the elder is standing firm behind you?”

That clumsy comfort felt like getting hit in the head with a hammer.

Even if I was scared, I could hide under Tang Jung’s shadow. Deokju had the strength to protect herself.

But what about Gyeonga and Songji?

Where were they supposed to hide?

My chest felt tight, like a heavy stone was crushing it.

I’d been so busy worrying about my own safety that I hadn’t even considered the two of them. I felt pathetic.

All I’d ever done was share a little food, and I’d strutted around like I was some generous person.

The moment I realized how selfish I’d been, my mind snapped clear. I set the teacup down with a clink.

“Older Sister. Thank you for the tea.”

“Are you sure you can leave already? Lie down a little longer before you go.”

“I’m fine. I’ll be going now.”

“You really never listen. Seriously.”

For all her irritated muttering, Tang Juhee looked genuinely worried. She helped me up from the bed, then pulled a pile of things out of a drawer and shoved them into Songji’s arms.

“If your mistress throws up again, boil this and feed it to her. If she can’t sleep tonight, burn incense in the bedroom. This is a tonic for her energy—one pill in the morning and one at night.”

“Y-yes! I understand, Young Lady!”

Songji’s eyes spun as she tried to memorize what each thing was for.

Every last one of them was useless to me—but there was no reason to expose a weakness by announcing that medicine didn’t work on me.

I dipped my head in thanks and stumbled out of the infirmary.

Deokju, waiting outside, rushed over and braced me.

“Young Lady. Your complexion is poor. Please, to your residence—”

“Before I go back, I need to stop by and see Grandfather. There’s something I need to ask—...No. Wait.”

I cut myself off, shaking my head and pressing my fingers to my forehead. 𝑓𝘳𝑒𝑒𝓌𝘦𝘣𝘯ℴ𝑣𝘦𝑙.𝘤𝑜𝑚

Just like Tang Juhee, Tang Jung wouldn’t understand me. To him, Songji and Gyeonga were tools assigned to attend me.

If I let it show that my mind was in turmoil, he might even decide to separate the two of them from me.

After a brief hesitation, I thought of someone who might actually understand what I was feeling.

“Songji. Bring me my cloak. Deokju, get ready—we’re going out.”

“Young Lady... you’re still not well. Where are you going...?”

“I have to go to Moon-Fragrance Pavilion.”

After answering, I stared beyond the wall.

*****

Even without an appointment, Hwahong came out to greet me as if she’d rushed over barefoot. She met my eyes with a seductive smile.

“My, Young Lady. I’m simply delighted you haven’t forgotten me and came to find Hwahong.”

“You said you’d help me.”

Only after I spat out my business did I realize how rude it was—but I didn’t even have the energy for pleasantries.

At my weak voice, Hwahong glided closer and whispered.

“Something happened.”

“Yes.”

“Then Hwahong will attend you. This way, Young Lady.”

She seated me in a soft chair, brought a blanket and draped it over my knees, then pressed a warm cup into my hands.

“You’ve come all this way—surely you’ll grant me the chance to offer you a cup of tea? Breathe in the scent, Young Lady. The quince fragrance is wonderful.”

She even patted the back of my hand gently. Only then did I see my hands—shaking so badly it was almost pitiful.

I was trembling like someone enduring midwinter in the middle of summer. Of course she’d assume something had happened.

I clamped my lips shut and wrapped both hands around the cup. When I steadied my breath and drew in the quince fragrance, the sweet scent loosened the tension in my body.

My muscles softened. My heart, which had been pounding chaotically, slowly found its pace again. Warmth returned to my fingertips, which had gone cold.

When my breathing settled, Hwahong smiled and spoke.

“Young Lady. The tea has cooled. Shall I pour you a fresh cup?”

Are you calm now? That was what she was asking. I nodded and opened my mouth.

“Proprietress. I want to speak with you alone.”

“If that’s what you wish.”

Hwahong rested her elbows on the table and laced her fingers together.

A large Energy Barrier bloomed around the two of us.

Pushed outside it, Deokju looked at me and mouthed silent words. Her brows were drawn tight—she clearly didn’t like me meeting Hwahong alone.

I shook my head to tell her to stay still. Deokju swallowed a sigh and retreated behind me.

Watching our exchanged looks, Hwahong spoke teasingly.

“That young lady has unusually good eyes. A loyal guard.”

“Yes. My girl is pretty kind.”

“My girl. So that’s what you call your guard? What an interesting expression.”

“Don’t you feel the same way about the people of Moon-Fragrance Pavilion? You’re the owner of this place.”

“Oh my.”

Hwahong’s eyes rounded, and she covered her lips as she laughed softly.

“Of course I do. I’m the only one who can protect my children.”

That half-laughing answer made something settle inside me.

Hwahong wasn’t like the Tang Clan’s blood relatives.

She was someone who could call courtesans—women the world pointed at and called filthy—her children.

If it was Hwahong, she wouldn’t look at me like I was strange. She wouldn’t treat what I said like a joke.

I swallowed hard and forced the words out.

“...Today, my maid’s tongue was cut out.”

“Oh my.”

“They said it was because she overheard something my small mother said. But that girl—she was just doing her job.”

“It’s something that happens endlessly to those without power. How unfortunate.”

Hwahong replied evenly, blinking those long lashes. Her expression clearly asked: So what do you want to say?

I asked quietly.

“Do you think so too? That it’s unfortunate, but unavoidable? That I should quietly cover it up?”

Hwahong’s eyes narrowed.

“I know well how the Tang Clan never forgets a debt or a grudge. But if you came to me seeking revenge, you’ve come to the wrong place, Young Lady. How could a lowly courtesan lay a hand on a Tang blood relative?”

“...Revenge?”

“I understand that you’re angry. Since you were raised in the Tang Clan, you must have learned to repay kindness twice over and repay resentment tenfold—so it must be even harder to endure. But sometimes, enduring is the answer too, Young Lady. Now is not the time for revenge.”

Hwahong coaxed me in a gentle, measured voice. She seemed to think I wanted to vent my rage on Madam Jo.

I shook my head.

“Revenge is meaningless. Revenge after you’ve lost everything is just a tantrum. I came because I want to know how to protect.”

“You think I know the answer?”

“Yes. You do. You protect everyone at Moon-Fragrance Pavilion.”

“......”

I met Hwahong’s eyes head-on and asked.

“How do I protect them? What do I have to do to protect my everyday life—my people?”