I'm an Unknown Actress, But Everyone Knows Me

* * *

Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang!

Aetami suddenly had the thought that this noise sounded familiar. The woman sitting next to her was clapping with the strength of ten people by herself.

‘This... when Yeoreum had that Taiwan fan meeting....’

It was the same clapping she had heard from the seat beside her back then. It was amazing how someone’s hands could produce applause that sounded like a sound effect.

Even after Yeoreum’s back disappeared from view as she walked down the stage with the trophy, the applause from the seat beside her did not stop.

‘This isn’t the time!’

Aetami quickly grabbed her phone. She needed to check the reaction on the forums.

-Wow Han Yeoreum is insane, the aura was tearing the stage apart lol 𝚏𝐫𝚎𝗲𝕨𝐞𝐛𝕟𝚘𝐯𝚎𝗹.𝕔𝐨𝗺

-They said she was Geum Bitgang’s favorite doll and it’s real TT_TT so damn proud

-Honestly the agency probably pushed her lol.. it’s way too obvious, calm down ^^

ㄴ Right? Intern Academy was nominated at the Hong Sang Theater Awards too, they probably just rotated prizes since they couldn’t give the grand prize;

-Baby Melon Bread can act in theater too omg

-Han Yeoreum is seriously no joke. I’ve been fangirling in this industry for years and I’ve never seen a rising actress climb this fast lol

ㄴ Same... honestly even most rising male actors can’t compete with this

The reaction was blazing hot. What Han Yeoreum had received was not just a simple rookie award.

It was a signal to the public of how far she might go from here.

[Geum Bitgang–Han Yeoreum Hong Sang Arts Festival Beautiful Two-Shot ⎜ StarCutCut]

[Han Yeoreum Shines with Two Crowns... “I Will Work Even Harder”]

[〈The Great Garland〉, 〈Intern Academy〉 Rising Star Han Yeoreum’s Acceptance Speech]

Aetami clenched her lips tightly in excitement. Her entire body felt like it had switched to vibration mode. She trembled.

‘Yeoreum!’

The more this admirable Baby Melon Bread did well, the more she wanted to do well too. It might not be like the idol industry where so many content drops poured out that you could practically shower in them, but she wanted people who noticed Yeoreum to naturally fall into her orbit.

Her greed kept growing.

‘Okay. First I’ll finish editing one more video before the final episode ★ 𝐍𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 ★ of The Great Garland....’

Just thinking about getting busier alongside Yeoreum’s filmography made her happy.

Even far in the future, when Han Yeoreum was loved by so many people that Aetami might be lost somewhere in the middle of an enormous crowd and Yeoreum wouldn’t be able to recognize her anymore...

She thought that would be fine too.

* * *

“Ah... this is overwhelming....”

Holding the trophy with both hands, I savored the taste of being a rising rookie popular actor. The Hong Sang Arts Festival had ended, but I couldn’t forget the dizzying feeling of standing on that stage.

“Yeoreum.”

The one who called my name was Lee Youngju.

When I turned around, Kim Ilhee and Park Sehee were poking Tak Jeongyun in the waist with their elbows beside her. What was this?

“Unni, hurry and tell her.”

“If not now, then when?”

“I, um... cough cough cough!”

Tak Jeongyun cleared her throat awkwardly. Finally unable to stand it, Lee Youngju spoke.

“Jeongyun unni got cast in the same project as you!”

“What!!!”

My mouth fell wide open.

“〈Seoul Metropolitan City〉!”

“What role, what role!!!”

At my question, shouted without any control over the decibels, the four of them covered their ears.

If there was a role that suited Tak Jeongyun the most right now, it would probably be that one.

‘Is my guess right?’

Tak Jeongyun tapped her ringing ears a couple of times before answering.

“A nurse.”

“Is it the senior nurse who appears in Do Gyeoul’s storyline?”

“Huh? Yeah?”

Of course I knew.

‘Some people said the character was frustrating, but overall it’s a role that stays in the audience’s heart for a long time.’

If anything, she was absolute good.

When every system collapses, when trust falls to the ground, when the world fills with selfishness from people desperate to survive—

“Still... save them.”

A character who sacrifices herself after leaving behind those words.

‘And Do Gyeoul inherits that spirit and becomes a character who struggles between good and evil....’

Do Gyeoul had probably memorized the entire script by now. Not a single word wrong.

‘It’s her greatest strength.’

Never stepping outside the boundaries that have been set, supported by a terrifying memory.

Do Gyeoul exists exactly as the writer’s character.

‘But right now... Do Gyeoul is probably....’

Stuck in the middle of character analysis. Everywhere she goes must feel like a wall.

‘Because she can’t understand the character.’

She’s probably dissecting every sentence written in the script.

‘Because she’s lacking.’

In the past it might have been different, but now I don’t even analyze characters when I go to auditions. And even if I did, there’s no way Do Gyeoul could obtain those videos.

Pi Chaewon, Jung Yeondu, Influencer 1, Seoryeong, Yeon Huijae.

The acting Do Gyeoul wants doesn’t exist in any of them. No matter how much she breaks them down into pieces, all she’ll get are crumbs.

“Unni. Can I ask you for one thing?”

I said to Tak Jeongyun.

“At some point Do Gyeoul will definitely ask you to analyze the script together.”

There was no way Do Gyeoul could understand a nurse who extends a hand of salvation even to filthy, ugly people who deserve to die.

“When that happens, tell me what interpretation Do Gyeoul came up with.”

What is she going to copy this time?

I need to know.

‘And the opposite....’

I’ll use that version of Do Gyeoul to analyze my Lee Seohae in 〈Unfair Trade〉.

* * *

Do Gyeoul visited the general ward of a large hospital for her nurse role.

‘A nurse....’

Since the character had a professional occupation, she needed to pick up a few distinctive habits that could naturally blend into everyday life.

The pure white hospital building certainly didn’t match zombies at all.

Something filthy, ugly, and that absolutely refuses to die.

Something white, sacred, and unable to declare anything absolute in the face of life and death.

‘The contrast is obvious... that’s probably why the stage was set here.’

Do Gyeoul observed the nurses passing by.

Restrained emotions. Faces carrying subtle fatigue. Feet constantly moving without rest.

The ward was already busy from early morning. A sentence written in large letters automatically caught Do Gyeoul’s eye, as she always read text out of habit.

“Encounters... are another form of healing.”

The phrases written on the walls all seemed meant to encourage patients and guardians.

Do Gyeoul wondered what difference reading such phrases even made. Her gaze shifted slightly to the side.

A nurse in scrubs.

Even as she walked quickly somewhere, the nurse glanced briefly at the sentence on the wall.

Just a very short moment.

‘Ah... that.’

Why do people love writing down their resolutions somewhere so much? Do Gyeoul couldn’t understand it.

‘Do they forget if they don’t read it while passing by?’

The motivational phrases taped to a student’s desk preparing for exams, the note inside a soldier’s locker saying he’ll become a different person after discharge, the #StartingDiet hashtags uploaded to social media every day, the phone wallpaper of a depressed person that reads “I am someone who deserves to be loved.”

‘If it’s only that much, writing it outside has no meaning.’

It was better to analyze rather than understand. Most humans didn’t require understanding anyway.

Because they like comfort, hate effort, like making excuses, and hate confronting reality.

Most human behavior could be explained with those things.

Do Gyeoul’s role was a rookie nurse who could not understand the senior who risked her life to save such pathetic people even in extreme situations.

‘I can manage the exhausted, suffocating, despairing expression....’

The problem was what came after. She had to continue fulfilling her duty as a nurse while carrying those emotions.

Do Gyeoul walked slowly. She observed everyone who passed through the hospital corridor.

A patient limping with an IV drip attached, a doctor in a white coat holding coffee in one hand, a guardian speaking on the phone with a trembling voice....

Inside this enormous hospital, Do Gyeoul imagined the countless vows people must have written somewhere.

Every law, every safety guideline, every oath in the world is created through someone’s sacrifice.

‘If that hadn’t happened, no one would have felt the need for it.’

-I solemnly pledge before God and all of you that I will live my life with righteousness and devote myself to professional nursing.

But even when all common sense collapses, must you still do your best? Why?

-I will not perform any act harmful to human life under any circumstances.

People pretend to respect each other’s lives and safety in normal times, but when fear of immediate death arrives, everyone harms others.

-I will do my utmost to raise the standard of nursing, and I will keep confidential any personal or family matters I learn while providing care.

Even if someone in the same shelter carries an infectious disease? Even if they hide it out of selfishness because they don’t want it exposed? Even if innocent people suffer because of that unfair situation?

Should I still remain silent?

Should I keep the rules even for someone who breaks them out of selfishness?

-I will cooperate sincerely with healthcare professionals and devote myself to the well-being of those who receive my nursing care.

Why should I devote myself?

Then is it natural that “I,” who faithfully completed regular education and lived with altruism toward others, must sacrifice and devote myself for selfish, ugly men with nothing in their heads?

Is it right for below-average humans to step on above-average humans to survive?

Is that truly the correct path for humanity in the long term?

Is self-sacrifice merely the result of selfishness and avoidance created by the desire to keep one’s conscience comfortable?

Or even before zombies existed... did those inferior humans deserve to live at all?

“I can still understand it up to this point.”

But after that—

“Still... save them.”

She had no idea how to move according to that sentence.

Only a vague silhouette appeared in her mind. The nurse she needed to create.

Obsessive hygiene habits, constant use of hand sanitizer, a working environment demanding memory pushed to the limit, a pen always carried in her pocket....

Thinking about her version of the nurse, Do Gyeoul sighed.

“This won’t work.”

The world was still full of things she couldn’t understand.

* * *

“Wow... the new year really did come after all.”

Manager Hong flipped the calendar with tired but satisfied eyes.

The year-end that had felt like a war was finally over. Once the award ceremonies ended, entertainment companies became relatively quiet.

JC ENM as well—

“Yeah right. Not happening.”

Manager Hong continued monitoring with shining eyes today as well.

The rookie with the hottest reaction right now.

He was checking the response to Han Yeoreum.

[Film*Drama Talk / Han Yeoreum’s filmography is seriously solid, nothing to throw away lol]

Her eye for projects is amazing T_T I already like her but I hope she becomes even bigger..

Anonymous 1: Personally the one-episode drama was my favorite, I hope she does something similar again T_T

Anonymous 2: She chooses good projects but the actor herself also pulls them off perfectly

Anonymous 3: Her filmography impressed me too lol personally I’m not into Faster Than the Law but it’ll probably do well anyway

ㄴ Anonymous 4: lol seriously Faster Than the Law is exactly the kind of thing regular viewers go crazy for

ㄴ Anonymous 5: Isn’t it about time Faster Than the Law releases

“Good today too—.”

Being mentioned positively even without paid viral marketing.

Information about Han Yeoreum circulating even without promotion.

Those two things were values you couldn’t buy even with money.

For now they had succeeded in planting the idea in the public’s mind that she was an actress worth watching.

“Once Eun Baekhap finishes The Great Garland, the new viewers flowing in will trickle down to our girl...”

Manager Hong began calculating.

After The Great Garland ended, the vlog launching 〈Youth Disqualified!〉 would be uploaded immediately.

After that, 〈Faster Than the Law 2〉 would be released right away.

A film released during the Lunar New Year holiday meant it was one of the most anticipated films of the year. JC ENM would pour in aggressive marketing and meticulous support.

“They all have to succeed.”

Once those two works pushed her growth further, the only thing left would be 〈Unfair Trade〉.

After appearing in that as well, Han Yeoreum would have to compete against the other actors already engraved in the public’s mind.

“She’s at a huge disadvantage in screen time. We need to grow her as much as possible before that.”

In 〈Seoul Metropolitan City〉, Do Gyeoul’s role had several times the amount of screen time compared to Han Yeoreum’s.

“Maybe it’s a fight we’re losing from the start....”

Manager Hong bit his lip.

“But still.”

An actress who had never disappointed him even once.

“Maybe our girl can win.”

In the end, it felt like Han Yeoreum would grasp the winning momentum.