A Wimp's Strategy Guide to Conquer the Tower

In some far-off dimension.

The Southphern Empire of the Olmus Continent.

Joseph Southphern, the former emperor, was gnawing on his fingernails.

Dimensional traveler Joseph.

For the sake of smooth travel, he had handed the throne to his child and spent more than a hundred years shut inside a hidden imperial vault.

His son—the current emperor—probably did not even know whether his father was alive or dead.

It did not matter.

Ever since Joseph became a dimensional traveler, his values had been completely overturned.

An emperor?

How could ruling a continent no bigger than a speck of dust compare to being a dimensional traveler?

The qualification to travel between dimensions gave Joseph more pride than the imperial throne ever had.

And yet even he had failed to win the bid for the Patek Philippe Grand wristwatch.

“Fuck!”

How dare someone outbid an item the emperor himself was aiming for?

It was truly infuriating.

It had been stolen right before his eyes.

Was it because he was short by one hundred thousand kilograms of top-grade Magic Stones?

Not a chance.

It was a physical problem.

The actual act of touching the holographic auction panel and pressing the top-bid button.

He simply had not been fast enough.

Even though Emperor Joseph had reached the rank of Grand Master.

Of course, it did not help that the big-spending dimensional travelers all rushed in at the final moment.

“Those dog bastards.”

He should have bought it this time.

Who knew when auctions for Earth items would stop again?

Would another one be listed?

Please.

Please.

Joseph waited anxiously.

And then, finally—

“Gasp!!!”

It appeared.

And not just anything.

Smart device: Apple iPad Pro 13-inch, 2TB, Black

(Large quantity of movies and dramas stored)

Starting bid: 1,000 kg of top-grade Magic Stones

“Are you—are you insane?!”

A tablet.

And one loaded with movies and dramas.

Unbelievable.

Such a precious item.

It was as if that Earth dimensional traveler had read his mind.

I’ll accept this gratefully.

How many tickets do I have again?

Hundreds of red tickets.

Dozens of blue tickets worth a million each.

Plenty of funds.

“I’m buying this no matter what!”

No charger was included, but that did not matter.

Did Joseph lack electronic devices?

He had used the auction house for ages.

A magic circle supplying the correct voltage and current would do just fine.

WHOOOOM!

Joseph drew aura up from deep within and circulated it through every corner of his mana roads.

The match would be decided one minute before the auction ended.

His hands had to be fast.

He had to hammer the top-bid button relentlessly.

If it were just him, maybe.

But countless rival dimensional travelers would be mashing the same button like mad.

This time, I must—

Before that, he would raise the price high enough to shake off the riffraff.

The fewer competitors there were, the easier the final sprint would be.

The penniless trash would try to lower the price through last-minute bid cancellations before joining the fight, but to big spenders, that was laughable.

Let’s jack the price up hard ten minutes before the end.

At around three hundred thousand, plenty of them will drop out.

So first, stay relaxed.

Practice touch inputs for bidding.

Time passed.

The full twenty-four-hour auction dragged on, boring Joseph to death.

Finally, one hour remained.

Now it was time.

Current bid: 170,557 kg of top-grade Magic Stones

Already 170,000.

Then, ten minutes before the end.

Current bid: 305,661 kg of top-grade Magic Stones

Three hundred thousand.

Enough.

He could raise it more, but he restrained himself.

If he spent everything here, how would he bid in the next auction?

The other dimensional travelers knew that too, which was why everyone was carefully managing the price.

It’s begun.

TAP TAP TAP TAP!

Emperor Joseph hammered the bidding hologram with a crazed expression.

One touch triggered an automatic top bid.

But someone else would immediately overbid him.

From one minute before the end, he had to press it like a madman.

Because the ending time was not exact.

No one knew when the auction would end.

Due to time differences between dimensions, it might end seconds early or seconds late.

That uncertainty drove people insane.

“AAAAAAARGH!!!”

Joseph screamed as he tapped.

Brilliant aura clung to his body.

His hands moved at a speed invisible to the naked eye.

TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP.

It’s mine.

I’ll have it.

And then—

[The auction for Apple iPad Pro 13-inch, 2TB, Black has ended.]

Former Emperor Joseph Southphern stood there, completely stunned.

The auction end message had appeared.

But there was no success notification.

“Damn it!”

Another failure.

“Haaaah...”

From a hidden chamber deep within the imperial vault of the Southphern Palace, a deep sigh quietly leaked out.

White Tower Floor 17.

Juhyeok wore a beaming smile.

“So much for a dimensional tycoon.”

“Ahaha, say that again later. If you keep sucking up Magic Stones, you’ll be a tycoon yourself someday.”

“I didn’t expect the tablet to be this popular.”

“Of course it is. Travelers or not, most of them are country bumpkins from backwater dimensions. Seeing paradise-tier items probably made their eyes pop.”

“Hey now. Calling them bumpkins? Those are our precious bidders.”

“Ah! My mistake. The customer is king.”

Exactly.

Someone had dropped five hundred thousand kilograms of top-grade Magic Stones on a single iPad.

Just two auctions had produced absurd results.

After fees, he held fifty-eight tickets worth 10,000 kg each.

The item information on one ticket was this:

Effect: Contains 10,000 kg of top-grade Magic Stones. When torn, the Magic Stones pour out. Feature: The ticket itself can be used as currency.

Damn!

How much money was one of these worth?

The Magic Stones had not even hit the market yet, but the mana value of top-grade Magic Stones was a thousand times higher.

“Alright, now that the money’s in, I’ll buy items for each of you. Pick what you want.”

Ding!

: Me, me! Silver ingots!

“Mari, since you’re well-behaved, I’ll buy you both gold ingots and silver ingots.”

: Thank you♥♡♥ Summoner♪

The others had already picked what they wanted.

Mad Demon wanted Great Return Pills.

Gyeon Dallae wanted high-quality cinnabar for drawing talismans.

Rajix wanted a small hammer containing true gold.

El wanted dwarven handcrafted gloves.

Mackenzie wanted a Demon-Realm wooden staff.

Veronica Caliber, Cossack, Meatshield, Bardin, and the others chose various weapons and equipment.

And Duyoksini wanted herbs.

He planned to extract seeds and plant them.

Diamat wanted the Demon King’s Heart.

And Jepetto—

“Royal Blood Essence? What’s this?”

“Literally royal blood. The pure essence of blood. A Blood Crystal.”

“Ah!”

“If you absorb it, you become Royal. As in, a vampire lord.”

“That’s good.”

“Yes.”

Of course he would buy it.

It cost about the same as a Dragon Heart.

“But, Jepetto.”

“Yes, sir!”

“Why do you talk like that?”

You’re not a knockoff Cossack.

Well, Juhyeok imitated him sometimes too.

“U-um... if I don’t talk like this... I thought... people might not pay attention to me...”

Oh dear.

Our poor, zero-presence Jepetto.

How badly did he want attention?

It would probably have the opposite effect.

Especially with the original glaring daggers at him.

Anyway, time to bid.

Opening the auction board and touching an item made a bid button appear beside its name.

Touch it, and—

[Placing a top bid on 100 kg of silver ingots.]

[If your top-grade Magic Stones are insufficient, the bid button will be disabled.]

[Upon successful bidding, the cost will be automatically deducted from physical Magic Stones or tickets.]

The bid increment varied with each press.

Small amounts increased by 1 kg, then later 3 kg, 5 kg, 7 kg, 11 kg, 13 kg...

He had no complaints about the pricing system, but if there were many competitors, it would be a headache.

You would have to keep pressing nonstop, glued to the board.

For ultra-popular items like tablets?

Competition would be fierce.

Like reserving tickets for a superstar concert.

Hogging five PCs in an internet café and mashing the mouse.

Fortunately, the items Juhyeok wanted were not popular.

Top bids barely happened.

Still, someone might outbid him occasionally, so someone had to stay there.

What do I do about this?

I can’t even rest.

Wait—

“Cossack?”

“Yes, sir! Original Cossack reporting.”

“You see the bid button, right?”

“I see it.”

“Try touching it.”

Cossack raised his hand and touched the bid button.

[Placing a top bid on 100 kg of silver ingots.]

“It works?”

“It works!”

“So it does.”

“Yes, it does.”

“Whoa.”

It worked.

Auction boards were shared, and proxy bidding was possible.

Well, summoned entities and the summoner were not strangers.

“Take turns proxy bidding and buy the items. I’ll give you Magic Stone storage tickets.”

“No worries. I will first entrust the tickets to Rajix, the dimensional farmhand.”

“As expected of our number-one auctioneer. Reliable as ever. Hahaha!”

“Hehehe! You flatter me.”

On White Tower Floor 17, laughter bloomed.

Even without climbing the Tower, there was this much to do.

Time flew by.

Every day, once a day, he stopped by the auction house, registering items for auction and bringing back the Magic Stone tickets he received in return.

They won plenty of items too.

Just the top-grade Magic Stones spent for the summoned entities amounted to about 400,000 kg.

Not a waste at all.

To someone sprinting toward becoming a dimensional tycoon, that was pocket change.

How did you retrieve items won at the auction?

Simple.

They put those into tickets as well.

Like this.

Effect: A Shaolin Great Return Pill is stored inside. Tear it to obtain the pill. Feature: The ticket itself can be traded.

Extremely convenient.

At this point, the auction house fully deserved its commission.

Before long, ◆ Nоvеlіgһt ◆ (Only on Nоvеlіgһt) the number of red tickets approached two hundred.

That meant 2,000,000 kg of top-grade Magic Stones.

In tons, that was 2,000 tons.

Once the number of red tickets grew large enough, a high-value exchange menu opened in the dimensional auction house.

[You may exchange 100 red tickets for 1 blue ticket.]

Oh?

Then let’s exchange just 100 red tickets.

[Please place 100 red tickets into the locker exchange slot.]

And then—

SHHHHH!

The 100 red tickets vanished, and a single blue ticket appeared.

Effect: Stores 1,000,000 kg of top-grade Magic Stones. Tear it to release them. Feature: The ticket itself can be traded.

It was basically a check.

After blue, what came next?

If 100 blue tickets made 100 million... black?

Or gold?

Guess I’ll find out once I collect a hundred.

It would not take long.

The enthusiasm for Earth goods was still blazing hot.

In the meantime, he listed all kinds of items.

Luxury bags, premium liquor, high-end cigarettes, assorted snacks with chocolates and candies.

Those sold well too.

But they could not compare to tablets and laptops.

Especially media devices packed full of content.

Those fetched the highest prices.

He had just bought and listed the latest gaming laptop as well.

The bidding price shot up at a terrifying pace.

Senior dimensional travelers—

I’ll keep supplying plenty for you.

For your junior, spend as much as you like.

Let’s plant a World Tree on White Tower Floor 17.

While he was completely immersed in auction fun, the long-awaited event finally happened.

Homebody Mari completed two alchemy items at once.

Thanks to the pure gold and pure silver ingots, it was finished faster than expected.

One was a homunculus body.

The other was a reinforcement elixir.

“So this is the reinforcement elixir?”

: Yes♪

It was a golden liquid.

Just looking at it, the luster was dazzling.

But the quantity was absurd.

A full 1.5-liter plastic bottle.

“Before drinking it, you should cleanse your body and cultivate your mind.”

“This old man thinks so too.”

“Don’t spill even a single drop.”

Hmm.

In genre novels, enhancement potions usually caused excruciating pain after drinking.

What if it hurt too much?

Could I even endure it?

Classic weak-man trait.

The moment things get tough, I give up fast.

Still, Mari made it with care.

...I’ll drink it slowly.

First, separate Baek Dana from the Ten-Thousand-Year Ice Crystal using the homunculus body.

Cossack brought the homunculus kit from Mari’s place.

A spherical object like a ball.

When placed on the floor—

SHRRRRK.

The metal sphere began transforming into a large, human-sized silver homunculus.

Like a metallic mannequin.

Its surface was soft and fluid, like mercury.

“Hm.”

One peculiar thing.

It was a female body.

Clear curves at the waist, chest, and hips.

“Is the Ice Crystal female too?”

Ding!

: Baek Dana said so. She said it fused with her soul and became female. I modeled the body after Baek Dana’s physique—like identical twins.

Which meant—

“Hm.”

“Ahem.”

“Mm.”

“Lady Baek, the Young Palace Mistress, is impressive too.”

Impressive how?

Anyway—

“Let’s separate the Ice Crystal first.”

The method was simple.

Baek Dana just had to hold the homunculus body’s hand tightly.

Then it would naturally transfer.

So they did.

Nothing happened.

Why?

Baek Dana spoke.

“It says the Ten-Thousand-Year Ice Crystal can’t move.”

“Hmm. Because it’s a homunculus?”

“No. The energy of the White Tower is blocking the transfer.”

Blocking it?

“Alright. Let’s go outside and try.”

Rajix put the homunculus body into a subspace backpack.

Juhyeok moved to the penthouse, then summoned everyone.

“Let’s do it now.”

“Yes.”

Baek Dana and the homunculus body stood facing each other, hands tightly clasped.

She activated ice arts.

TSSSSS—!

A blizzard raged through the penthouse living room.

After a moment—

The homunculus body began turning pure white.

TSSSSS—!

Did it work?

What about Baek Dana?

Name: Baek Dana

Rank: LSSR (Legend Special Super Rare)

Type: Martial Artist (Human)

“Oh!”

Success.

Even after separation, she was still LSSR.

“Congratulations.”

“S-sniff... th-thank you. How can I ever repay this kindness?”

“Kindness, nothing. Just live comfortably from now on.”

“Yes!”

What about the Ten-Thousand-Year Ice Crystal?

Did it transfer properly?

But—

“...What?”

TSSSSS—

The Ten-Thousand-Year Ice Crystal homunculus was frozen solid, completely motionless.

Like an ice doll taken straight out of a freezer.

“Why on earth—”

At that moment—

Ding!

[Would you like to grant summoned status to the Ten-Thousand-Year Ice Crystal in exchange for 10 Platinum Badges?]

“Huh?”

[If the Ten-Thousand-Year Ice Crystal gains summoned status, it can immediately be recruited into the Catalog.]

“Ah...”

[Granting summoned status and Catalog recruitment will impose a penalty on the player.]

I’ve experienced this before.

Exactly like when recruiting El, the magitech engineer.

Just with a different number of Platinum Badges.

[...The penalty applied to the player is suspension of random summoning for 100 days.]

Hmm...

I think I understand.

Until now, the Ten-Thousand-Year Ice Crystal had been parasitizing Baek Dana’s soul.

That was why it behaved almost like a summoned entity.

But now it was fully separated.

Even if it possessed personality and spirituality, it was not a summoned entity.

It had not come from the world of souls.

So could it really become part of Juhyeok’s Catalog?

Its current state was ambiguous.

Not an Earthling.

Not a summoned entity.

An existence that was fundamentally abnormal.

It might soon be expelled somewhere.

Or simply disappear.

But with 10 Platinum Badges, he could grant it qualification.

Immediate recruitment.

Permanent residence on White Tower Floor 17.

They really like making people agonize over choices.

The next random summon was only two days away.

Should I do it after that?

[The opportunity to grant summoned status is valid for 5 minutes.]

[After 5 minutes, the opportunity will disappear, and the Ten-Thousand-Year Ice Crystal will be destroyed.]

“...Damn.”

If he did not accept it, because it was an alien existence, it would simply be erased?

What about the Ice Crystal?

He had bonded with it, at least somewhat.

But if he accepted it, the 100-day suspension of random summoning was painful.

“Wouldn’t it be better to accept it?”

“This old man agrees. It seems highly useful.”

“I also support it. Its power is exceptional—strong enough to freeze even an ancient dragon’s true body.”

: I used so many materials to make the homunculus body... it’d be a waste to give up now.

Alright.

So what if random summoning slowed down a bit?

“Grant summoned status!”

[Granting summoned status to the Ten-Thousand-Year Ice Crystal using 10 Platinum Badges.]

Good.

Ten-Thousand-Year Ice Crystal.

Let’s live well together from now on.