Pokemon: Bounty Hunter Alex

"So, you’re my new employer?" a young girl’s high-pitched voice called out from a hole in the wall that Alex had missed.

"You look like the type who’s been coming after me. A bit too young though. Oh, an Arcanine. You can’t have one of those while being evil. Yup, you pass. So how’s the pay? The living conditions? The requirements? Tell me everything you know!"

"Alex Ashford Wattson looking for an in-house engineer at a farm. The pay starts at 300 thousand yearly with a 1% cut per bounty I collect. You’ll have your own house separate from your workspace. I need you to work on a hydroponics setup and make guns for me," Alex replied in rapid succession to keep up with her energy.

"Excellent! Welcome to the team," she replied with excitement as she jumped down from the hole. "We’re going to make so many babies together."

She was a small, flat-chested girl with tanned skin and wavy auburn hair. Her infectious, hyperactive energy made it hard to keep up with her.

Her hands never stopped moving—fidgeting with tools, tapping gadgets, or adjusting her oversized goggles that always seemed to slide down her nose. Despite her size, she carried herself with the confidence of someone who could take apart a tank and rebuild it twice as deadly.

"The name’s Rhea. You can call me Rhea. Don’t try to get any more names out of me. I’m not telling," the girl ranted as she began circling Alex, inspecting him through her goggles.

"Devon Corp’s neutered guns, personalized bulletproof gear, no helmet despite being in pitch black darkness... Dark Affinity? Short blonde hair, deep black eyes that feel like staring into the abyss. A bit young for me, but you’ll do."

She kept circling, rattling off observations as if ticking off a checklist, completely ignoring Alex’s presence beyond the role of subject. She was clearly the type who lived at her own pace, intensely focused, entirely unfiltered, and utterly impossible to interrupt.

"So, what did Argent Solutions do to scare you off?" Alex asked, trying to grab her attention.

"This," she said, opening a Pokéball and releasing an Elite Rank Tinkaton between them, "is my starter and partner in crime. Say hello, Tink."

"Tink!" the little pink Pokémon chirped, waving her massive hammer and stirring up a gust in the cave.

"They wanted me to start beating my Pokémon for some stupid fucking reason," she snapped. "So I planted explosives in my lab, ran, and blew everything up. That’ll teach ’em to mess with my Tink."

"I toiled in that damn lab for 10 years, and then some hotshot new management shows up, acting like they own us, telling us how to live our lives. They should’ve just settled for a normal employment instead of being such dicks about it."

"Anyway, I blew up the lab and everything in it, but I kept the files on my personal laptop. Wanna see?" she asked, handing Alex a laptop that had been strapped to her lower back.

"Perhaps when we get to the farm," Alex replied, signaling Arcanine to teleport them.

Rhea quickly returned Tink to her Pokéball and jumped onto Alex, clinging tightly as the teleportation took effect.

"You’re bigger than you look," she said as her hands started roaming around Alex’s body. "You’re pretty muscular under all this armor. Mommy like."

In a flash of light, they reappeared in front of the mansion at the farm.

"Wow! You actually meant a plant farm, like crops and shit," she said, looking around with wide eyes.

"What other kind of farm did you think I meant?" Alex asked.

"I heard some of the new blood talking about farms where they corral people or Pokémon for sex and things. I didn’t think you meant vegetables. You’re going to have to get me a bigger space if you want me to start mass producing guns."

"I don’t need you to mass produce anything. Just make the guns I want for personal use and manage the hydroponics farm. That’ll be enough. You’re free to do your own research in your free time. I’ll even sponsor the materials."

"For realsies? Cool beans. You’re the best boss ever!" she cheered, jumping onto Alex again and resuming her overly familiar inspection with zero boundaries.

She was certainly a hugger.

"Come, I’ll introduce you to the other girls and the operation we’ve got going," Alex said, walking off as Rhea clung to him like a koala.

Their first stop was the kitchen, where Lina and Vera were baking poffins and blending Pokéblocks for the Pokémon.

"Lina, Vera, this is our new engineer, Rhea," Alex said. "Rhea, this is Lina, our cook and Vera our breeder."

"If you ever need snacks, just let me know," Lina offered with a warm smile.

"If you ever need Pokeblocks, just let me know," Vera offered as well.

"Are those vanilla poffins? Can I have some? They look delicious!"

"You can take a few from the other counter. Those ones are for the Pokémon."

Rhea didn’t wait for a second invitation. She grabbed handfuls and stuffed them into her small mouth, cheeks puffed like a hamster’s, then hummed in delight.

"They’re delicious," she mumbled through a mouthful. "It’s official. You’re my new favorite person. We’re gonna be best friends."

Next, they headed to the massage parlor where Mira was massaging a few Pokémon. After a quick introduction, Mira gave Rhea a firm shoulder rub that had her melting into the seat.

"It’s official," Rhea murmured with a blissful expression. "You’re my new favorite person. We’re gonna be best friends."

Their third stop was the workshop, formerly Elara’s domain, where Rhea’s demeanor suddenly shifted.

"It’s adequate for my needs," Rhea said, casting an appraising glance around the space. "I’m surprised you dedicated so much room to just a workshop. I’ll need a list of supplies ordered as soon as possible so I can get to work."

Though usually a bundle of hyperactive energy, she quickly shifted into a more professional mode the moment she stepped into the industrial sized lab.

The workshop, spacious enough to fit a small Cessna, had been built with Elara’s specialty in mind: industrial engineering. A few scattered machines still lingered in the corners, remnants of its previous occupant.

"Is that the latest sniper model?" Rhea asked, eyeing the assassin’s rifle on the table.

"Got it off an assassin who tried to kill me last week. I have a few ideas for improvements."

"Do tell."

"Enlarge the bullet and pair it with a Flying type energy crystal so it can fire semi automatic."

"That would mean enlarging the entire gun."

"Yes. Since it’s built for long range, it might as well be bulky."

"The recoil would be immense."

"No problem for a man of my size and strength."

"Yes, I see why you need my services. I’m glad you chose me for this project. Do you have any other ideas?"

"We will talk more about that once you are settled. For now, let’s head to the server room. Nyx, your supplier, should be there."

Next was the server room, where Nyx was in the middle of a game with Metagross and a pair of Rotoms.

"Nyx, this is Rhea, the new engineer," Alex introduced. "Rhea, this is Nyx, the farm’s manager and my information specialist."

"You’re SexyButt69?" Rhea blurted.

"You’re LittleMenace98?" Nyx replied, equally surprised.

They stared at each other for a moment, then nodded approvingly for some reason Alex didn’t care to understand.

"Rotom, where’s Kaia?" Alex asked.

"At the hydroponics facility," Rotom replied in its synthetic monotone.

When Alex turned back, the girls were already gathered around a pair of monitors, focused on some game he did not recognize.

With a sigh, he lifted the little munchkin by the back of her collar and draped her over his shoulder.

"Come on," he said. "Two more stops before I let you loose on the farm."

"Nooo! This doesn’t count. We haven’t started playing yet. I demand a do-over!" Rhea wailed.

"You snooze, you lose," Nyx called back, smirking.

"Cancel whatever deal you’ve made, Nyx. Business first," Alex ordered sternly.

"Yes, Daddy," she gushed in response.

Alex rarely used his stern commanding voice outside the bedroom, but this time it had the desired effect. It seemed to have worked on Rhea too, who stopped struggling and draped herself over him like a sack of potatoes.

Carrying Rhea with him, Alex headed for the hydroponics farm, stopping briefly at the training grounds to introduce her to the Pokémon as the new engineer.

After a few acknowledging grunts from the Pokémon, he continued on to the hydroponics area, where Kaia was directing the Goomys and Araquanids to use Sunny Day and Rain Dance on the plants that needed them.

"Hey, Kaia. Meet our new resident engineer, who will be taking over for Elara," Alex said, setting Rhea down so she could stand on her own.

"Rhea, this is Kaia, the farm’s caretaker. She manages both the orchard and the hydroponics section. Make sure to listen to her—she knows what the plants need better than either of us or any scientific paper you can find."

"So, this is the famous hydroponics farm. It’s a bit outdated," Rhea said as she looked around.

"It hasn’t even been a year," Kaia protested.

"They just released a more efficient system," Rhea explained in a professional tone. "It uses a drip method instead of mist, which reduces waste and minimizes buildup on the greenhouse interior. It also needs less maintenance on the sprayer that suffers from mineral buildup."

"Can you replace the system we’re using now?" Alex asked.

"Sure. I just need to swap out all the nozzles and calibrate the flow. No problem."

"I’ll leave it to you then. Kaia, would you mind showing her around and then taking her to an empty house so she can move in?"

"Not at all."

"Great. Welcome to the farm, Rhea."

"Happy to be here."

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