I'm a weak Exorcist, and the Yanderes Around Me Aren't Human

"Come inside."

She walked in past him, humming something low and cheerful under her breath.

He instantly realized that it was the song he sang at the karaoke.

But he didn’t say anything.

He set the grocery bag on the kitchen counter.

She appeared beside him and lifted it from his hands before he could start unpacking.

"I will handle this," she said. She was already looking inside with interest.

"Go take a hot shower. You look tired."

He looked at her face. She was reading a label, brow slightly furrowed, fully occupied.

"Okay," he said carefully.

She was sorting his groceries and telling him to shower.

He was not going to push it. He went to the bathroom with a towel.

The water was hot.

He lowered himself in slowly and leaned his head back against the edge of the tub and looked at the ceiling.

The karaoke. Hana’s laugh. The metro.

Her saying it’s a date through closing doors.

He closed his eyes.

And smiled...

A shadow appeared under the bathroom door.

Two feet, visible in the gap, standing right outside.

"Kai~~~." Her voice came through the door, soft and casual. "I feel a bit sweaty too. I think I need a shower." A pause. "I’m coming in."

The door handle moved.

A sharp crack.

A yelp.

"WHAT—" Her voice came out loud and completely unguarded.

"You sneaky little bastard— you have a talisman in there too!"

Kaito looked up at the wall above the door.

The talisman hung there, slightly crooked.

"Guess you’ll have to wait for your turn," he said.

"You little shit— ugh! Of all the— are you serious?! A talisman in the bathroom?! Who does that?!"

He smiled at the ceiling.

"Are you actually cursing at a talisman," he said.

The cursing stopped.

Silence.

He settled back into the water and closed his eyes.

He had seen it coming.

She had not.

She was standing outside a locked bathroom door with nothing to do about it.

It was a good feeling.

Silence continued.

Then, soft and unhurried, her voice came back through the door.

"Kai~~~."

He opened one eye.

"You know," she said, "I am completely naked right now."

He stared at the ceiling.

The hot water suddenly felt less relaxing.

.

The groceries were spread across the kotatsu table.

Bread, ham, cheese, lettuce, two tomatoes, a small tub of butter, and a squeeze bottle of mayo.

No cooking required. No stove.

Just assembly.

Shizuka sat across from him with her legs folded under her, silver hair loose around her shoulders, already pulling the bread apart with her fingers.

Her red eyes moved across the ingredients with a focused interest she brought to anything that was fun.

She picked up a slice of ham, held it up to the light, and turned it slowly.

"I can’t believe you didn’t open the door," she said. "Even after I said I was naked."

"I know what you were doing."

"Are you gay?"

"No."

She set the ham down and reached for the cheese, squeezing it between her fingers. "Just checking."

He spread butter on his bread.

She was already building her sandwich, taking her time about it — ham laid flat, cheese torn into pieces and scattered across it, lettuce smoothed down, two rounds of tomato, a careful line of mayo along the top slice.

She pressed both halves together with both palms and looked at the result with satisfaction.

She looked up at him.

Her red eyes bright, the choker at her throat, the crop top doing very little as she leaned slightly forward over the table.

"Ready," she said, and held the sandwich out toward him.

"Say Aaah~~~."

He looked at the sandwich. He looked at her.

A small smile at the corner of her lips.

He leaned forward and took the bite she offered.

The butter and mayo together, the cold tomato, the ham.

Simple and exactly right.

"It’s tasty," he said.

She giggled, short and pleased, pulled the sandwich back and took her own bite.

Her eyes closed briefly. "Of course it is."

He started building his.

Less precise. Ham, cheese without much thought to distribution, tomato, lettuce, mayo. He pressed the top slice down.

Before he had even decided to offer it, she was already watching him with her mouth open, chin slightly raised, waiting.

He held the sandwich toward her.

She took the bite, neat and clean.

The corners of her mouth pulled up slowly.

"Tastyyy."

He took his own bite.

They ate across from each other.