Surviving In This Filthy World As A Novel Villain

"Who are you? Who let you in?" The attending doctor with glasses saw his chance to step up again. He pointed at the strangely dressed Eric, his face full of dislike.

"I think I've seen you before," a young doctor suddenly said loudly. "Oh, right! I remember now! You're that internet guy! The one who pooped on the street live on video!"

In a flash, everyone took half a step back, putting distance between themselves and Eric.

"No! Don't talk nonsense! That was an accident!" Eric panicked instantly. Pooping in public was the most embarrassing moment of his life.

For someone to bring it up now, right in front of the girl he liked? It felt like being slapped hard across the face, and then asked if it stung.

"It really is you! I wouldn't forget," the young doctor insisted, thinking Eric was just denying it. He pulled out his phone, opened the video app, found the video of Eric pooping on the street, and held it up for Eric to see.

Not only that, worried that others wouldn't know, he turned the volume way up for everyone to watch and hear.

'Are you freaking kidding me? Are you an idiot?! Damn you!' Eric was screaming inside his head. 'How can someone be this stupid? Who asked you to find this video?!'

[The Protagonist 'Eric Vaughan' has a Mental Breakdown. Congratulations, you have earned 2222 Critical Points.]

"See? This is you! I even gave you a big 'Like' on a video app back then," the young doctor said proudly, puffing out his chest and keeping the phone volume maxed out.

The only sound in the room was the constant 'poot, poot, poot' from the video.

Riley, hiding behind Alex and peeking out, her eyes wide with disbelief. 'Did a person actually do that?'

The pooting sounds, the faint yellow cloud in the video... even through the screen, she felt like she could almost smell it.

Without thinking, she glanced at Eric's tightly wrapped rear end. It looked like it was bound with layers and layers of gauze and bandages. She couldn't tell how thick it was, but Eric's butt stuck out more than a woman with a very large chest.

Then, Riley thought she saw, hidden among the many layers of white wrappings, a tiny, hard-to-spot hint of bright red blood.

"Hiss!"

She gasped, shocked, and looked back at Eric, who was still desperately trying to explain that the person spraying poop in the video wasn't him.

'Doesn't that hurt?' she wondered.

Just looking at it made Riley feel pain for him.

Ann, lying in the bed, had just started to get some color back in her face, but seeing the video made her turn white as a sheet again.

The old lady was over seventy. She'd seen plenty of tough situations in her life, but she'd never seen anything like Eric Vaughn in that video, spraying poop four or five meters away through his pants. 𝑓𝘳𝘦𝑒𝑤𝑒𝘣𝘯ℴ𝘷𝘦𝓁.𝑐𝑜𝑚

That could probably set a world record!

The old lady's face was pale. She grabbed her granddaughter's arm and pulled her back, propping herself up slightly with her elbows. "Stay far away from people like that," she whispered urgently. "He's crazy. Even the police can't do much if he breaks the law."

After all, mentally ill people often didn't face punishment for murder, let alone just grossing people out.

Riley nodded frantically. Grandma was right.

What kind of normal person poops on the street? And who could spray it out like a cannon? Worse still, the video had been playing for seven or eight minutes, and the Eric in the video showed no signs of stopping.

He actually looked like he was getting more excited the longer he went, not just shooting cannons but adding some nasty skin-colored smoke bombs too!

Several of the older doctors in the room couldn't help but glance towards Eric Vaughn's butt.

"Now I remember!" one middle-aged doctor suddenly exclaimed as if remembering something important.

"About a week ago, the hospital's butt doctor department took in a patient that even the mental hospital didn't want. That was you, wasn't it?"

He quickly explained, "My wife works in that department. She told me they got a crazy patient who actually ripped his own butt open from pooping so hard. She said cleaning his butt was so disgusting it nearly made people puke."

"So, the people in her department came up with an idea. The department head somehow found a stray dog... and hey! Believe it or not, the dog cleaned things up way faster and better than any person could! I didn't believe it at first, but now... now I believe it."

'This guy is something else,' everyone thought.

"You're talking crap!" Eric felt deeply insulted. What did he mean, a stray dog cleaned his butt?

Even Alex sucked in a breath, suddenly feeling a strange respect for that department head. He decided right then to give the man a raise tomorrow.

'Now that's talent,' Alex thought. 'Knows how to use the right... uh... method for the person.'

"You're lying! That wasn't me! You must have remembered wrong!" Eric was freaking out. "A dog chewing my butt? How could something that disgusting be me?"

This wasn't how the script was supposed to go! The story shouldn't be going this way!

At that moment, Eric deeply regretted coming in here. 'Why the hell did I come in? Why?!'

Oh, right. Why did he come in?

Remembering his reason, Eric suddenly shouted, "Shut up! I told you, that wasn't me! Believe it or not, I'll send my lawyer after you!"

A threat with a lawyer letter.

Except, nobody in the room took Eric's 'threat' seriously. Send a lawyer letter? Yeah, right. Can you also sing, dance, and play basketball?

"I came here to tell you the truth!" Eric yelled again.

"Oh?" Alex smiled, a teasing look in his eyes. "The truth? You mean the truth that you are the guy who pooped on the street?"