Players: All NPCs in the Sect Are Moles

"SOB SOB SOB... Our little sister’s passing was so sudden!"

"She just became our sect’s Holy Daughter, and now she’s left us."

"Yeah, she was perfectly fine yesterday. How could she be gone, just like that?"

"It’s all our fault. We didn’t care for her enough. Thinking back on it now, we’re filled with regret!"

Listening to these eulogies, Su Ling’er couldn’t stop ranting internally:

’I’m not dead yet!’

’I’m perfectly fine!’

’I can still be saved!’

’Why are you all just deciding for yourselves that I’m dead?!’

’Stop making up my story for me!’

Soon, the funeral procession arrived at the main peak’s plaza.

The plaza had already been transformed into a solemn Spirit Hall.

In the center of the plaza, a high platform had been built from white marble Spirit Stones.

The platform was surrounded by white spirit chrysanthemums and yellow Soul-Binding Flowers, all of which were high-quality funerary Spirit Plants.

Above the plaza, a massive white banner hung from the sky, with two lines of large characters written in a strong, powerful script—

[MOURNING THE TRAGIC PASSING OF GUIXI SECT’S HOLY DAUGHTER, SU LING’ER!]

[MAY THE HOLY DAUGHTER OF THE GUIXI SECT REST IN PEACE!]

Lying in her coffin, Su Ling’er peered through a small hole and saw the two glaring banners with perfect clarity.

She felt a mouthful of old blood get stuck in her chest, nearly turning her "feigned illness" into a "real death."

’Passing of an immortal?!’

’I’m not even an immortal yet!’

’And even if I became one, it wouldn’t be to "pass away"!’

’And "rest in peace"?!’

’Just how badly do you want me to hurry up and die!’

’These fiends are surprisingly good at running a funeral.’

’Look at this spectacle. Anyone who didn’t know better would think some major figure had died.’

’Did you guys from the Guixi Sect get your start by running a funeral home business?’

’"Tragic mourning"... Yeah, right! I can see several of you disciples over there trying to hold back your laughter!’

She squinted, trying to make out the calligraphy on the banner. The more she looked, the more familiar it seemed...

’Isn’t that Eldest Brother’s handwriting?!’

She had seen Eldest Brother’s writing before, and this was a near-perfect match!

’Unbelievable!’

’Lin Qingfeng!’

’So you wrote this yourself!’

’How desperate are you to see me die that you had to write the banner with your own hand?!’

Su Ling’er ground her teeth in fury, wishing she could charge out right now, rip down that banner, and shove it into her Eldest Brother’s mouth!

...Alright, she didn’t dare.

She forcefully suppressed her rage.

’I’ll endure!’

’I’ll endure!!!’

’This is all to ensure Wang Xiedi’s stealth mission proceeds smoothly!’

’Once Wang Xiedi gets the Heart-Connected Fruit, once we have a chance to escape this den of demons, I, Su Ling’er, will repay today’s humiliation a hundredfold!’

As her thoughts ran wild, the jade coffin was placed steadily atop the high platform in the center of the plaza.

Lying inside, she could see through the small hole that the plaza was already filled with disciples.

Everyone had changed into pure white mourning clothes, and the atmosphere was oppressive to the extreme.

A new wave of turmoil crashed through Su Ling’er’s heart.

’I’m seriously starting to suspect you guys really did start out as undertakers!’

’This is way too efficient!’

’Has it even been two hours since I became "critically ill" to the "funeral" itself?!’

’And another thing, where did you get so many sets of mourning clothes?!’

’Does the sect issue these things as standard uniform?!’

Then, she saw her Eldest Brother, Lin Qingfeng, dressed in a simple white robe, slowly walk up to the high platform.

His face was drawn, his eyes slightly red, the very picture of a man grieving the loss of a loved one.

Looking at him, Su Ling’er’s skin crawled.

’Dude, if you have time to look this heartbroken, why don’t you just wait for Wang Xiedi to succeed, haul me out of this coffin, and I’ll "recover" for you on the spot, how about that?!’

’This undercover life is just too damn hard!’

Lin Qingfeng stood beside the jade coffin, his gaze sweeping over the crowd below as he spoke in a heavy voice:

"My fellow disciples, today we gather with heavy hearts to bid farewell to the most diligent disciple of our Guixi Sect, our most beloved Holy Daughter—our little sister, Su Ling’er."

"Our little sister... although she came from a humble background, had poor aptitude, and terrible bone structure, and even had a Pseudo Spirit Root, she was also a duplicitous slacker, lazy to the bone, a lover of leisure and a hater of work, slacking off all day, given to debauchery, and fond of screeching wildly..."

He spouted a long-winded list of negative traits, and the disciples below could barely contain the smirks on their faces.

Then, Lin Qingfeng’s tone shifted, becoming incredibly passionate.

"But! The resilience of her Dao Heart and the tenacity of her will far surpassed that of Wang Xiedi!"

Su Ling’er: "..."

’What are you talking about?’

’What in the world are you talking about?!’

’Duplicitous slacker?’

’Lazy to the bone?’

’Since when was I a lover of leisure, a hater of work, and given to debauchery?!’

’If you’ve run out of things to say, just shut up! Don’t just pin random labels on me!’

’And my resilient Dao Heart is for the sake of seeking eternal life, for the common people, for the righteous path!’

’It’s not so you can hold a memorial service for me here!’

’And there’s absolutely no need to compare me to Wang Xiedi!’

’Couldn’t you have picked a better person for comparison?!’

’Being stronger than Wang Xiedi doesn’t make me happy at all!!!’

"Alas, with her short life, she showed us the true meaning of cultivation—’to find life in death, to be unyielding and indomitable’..."

Lying in the coffin, listening to her Eldest Brother’s "sincere" eulogy full of "mixed reviews," Su Ling’er felt like she was about to explode.

’What’s this about a "short life"?’

’I’m just a teenager!’

’I plan on living for several hundred more years!’

’Oh my god!’

’What kind of Eldest Brother is this?!’

’Someone, please come and get rid of this monster!’

Eldest Brother’s eulogy continued.

"...She was like a shooting star. Though her time was brief, she streaked across the night sky of our Guixi Sect, leaving behind the most brilliant light."

"Her face and her smile will forever be etched in our hearts."

"Her spirit will forever inspire us to forge ahead bravely on our path of cultivation!"

Lying in her coffin, Su Ling’er’s face was the picture of someone who had lost all will to live.

She was tired. Her head hurt. Just let the world burn.

To think that just by faking an illness, she would have to endure such brutal mental torture.

"And now, I invite our sect’s most professional master of ceremonies, ’Ji,’ to... mourn for our little sister!"

As his voice fell, ’Ji,’ also dressed in white, stepped out from the crowd.

He held no Magical Artifacts, merely bowing deeply to Su Ling’er’s jade coffin.

Then, he slowly straightened up, lowered his head, and stood in silence, as if brewing his emotions.

A bleak autumn wind rustled, sweeping up a few fallen leaves and adding to the sorrowful atmosphere.

But lying in the coffin, Su Ling’er felt a sense of foreboding.

’What kind of stunt is this guy going to pull now?’

A few breaths later, Ji snapped his head up, opened his mouth wide, and let out a wail that could startle gods and ghosts alike—

"AHHH—!!!"

That one cry echoed in all directions, a heart-wrenching sound that seemed to drop the temperature of the entire plaza by several degrees.

Immediately after, his knees gave way, and he fell before the jade coffin with a THUD.

He then pounded the ground with his hands, his face instantly covered in tears and snot.

Then, he began his "professional" mourning wail.

"Oh, heavens! Why did you let my sister’s life be cut short on her path to the Dao!"